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Is a lady’s virginity more important than that of a man? Does virginity, whether for females or males a guarantee success in marriage? These and so many more questions arose after a seemingly controversial topic on the *Benefits of Virginity*.

via Male’s Virginity – Is it really necessary? — Simply Answers

Old stuff

I was looking for this. The website itself is no longer available, however, thanks to archive.org I can retrieve it. And the blog itself which inspired the post.

That blog Virgin at 50 has long been deleted, but it survives. Safe to say he probably was only writing it for two months and then pulled the plug. And who knows what ever happened to this Matt Savage character?

When I started this blog I was able to find this through a google search. Now not so much, perhaps his domain hosting has expired and he’s retired from doing relationship advice. Can’t find him anywhere on this internet!

As another aside I found this from this “How to lose your virginity” blog. A 38-year-old male virgin wants to know how to proceed with a married woman in a sexless marriage who is willing to help him lose his virginity. That’s a moral quandary I’d want to stay away from, I would never allow myself to be that desperate.

Anecdote

adult business computer connection

I’m sorry to say I have one more Anthony the Hustler anecdote to tell you. I won’t just go full negative and tell you he’s a horrible person, but just an M.O. that I had finally worked out for myself years later. If you remember when he started working at “The Show” one of the first things he did was ask for money. Well I won’t repeat that whole sequence of events.

What I will do is say if it hadn’t been for him, I’m not sure how the “streak era” would’ve started. As I have tried to convey as far as myself he was always concocting a plan and the plan was to benefit him. He’s kind of an alpha like that trying to get his way and seems to like to play long ball. Whatever the case may be he put me onto the mgmt job at a small theater chain. I had already known about it, but had initially decided that I don’t have what they needed (which was mgmt experience, I had none).

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With this said he did give me a tip for a job, I took advantage. Especially as the summer at the theater was getting real strange, it just wasn’t a good summer. He made a ploy to get $20 from myself and I told him to eat it for an update on the process which took longer than I thought it would. I thought there would be interviews in July instead of late August. Of course I leaned on Anthony because he claimed to know people up there, not necessarily the owner whom I’d be interviewing with (though incidentally years later he would also claim she was chasing him around trying to do business with him and he turns her down).

Moving on, as I start to get more frustrated with “The Show”, I wait for the owner to get back to me – well mgmt candidates. My issue when you think about it now, is that I sort of put all of my eggs in one basket. If I didn’t get it – which happened – I’m back at square one. Perhaps a form of one-itis which when it comes to job hunting I can be vulnerable (and women too perhaps). Anyway no need to retell the whole story I was very disappointed that after e-mails of next steps she cut me out of the process.

Of course with someone like an Anthony, he would claim he put in a good word for me. He “pulled his strings” to get me an opportunity to interview and allowed myself to believe I could actually do this. Then the crash and the start of the “streak era“. He had claimed to be part of the process himself and expressed interest in bringing me on as a supervisor (as opposed to mgr). Unfortunately no one gets hired in that theater’s recruitment efforts.  I don’t hold him responsible for my own expectations, though I do hold him responsible for a pattern of behavior where it just hasn’t benefited me, especially financially. He benefits with small infusions of cash and with ammunition to say I owe him.

Before he left the show he did that somewhat often. I told him an electronics store had called me and as I drove him home, he gets mad because with all the tips he gives me I held out on him in his mind. When you think about it, he wouldn’t let me “hold out” on him and he probably would “hold out” on me. He probably doesn’t appreciate say the small infusions of cash he just takes and doesn’t expect me to ask for anything in return. When he left he makes sure to let me know about all the tips I wouldn’t take advantage of the moment he implies we may not talk a lot about jobs. Of course this was before he asks for money to put into his martial arts school.

To wrap this up, I whined for a long time about not getting that mgmt job. I needed it and just added to the frustration of the “streak era” because every time I failed to get the job I go back to what happened at the beginning with the theater. I often complained to him about it and while he gave me the possible answers, he had to tell me to get over it. It was a dodged bullet in the long run, however, another dodged bullet was he can’t use that job to turn around and say I owe him.

It’s no small feat by any means to not only move on to “Gotham Bank“, “Fresh Foods” or even to the national theater chain for a brief time. What I can claim credit is that I did that on my own, didn’t need him with the connections for that. The jobs he claimed to have connections were never guarantees other than to just get me in the door for an interview and perhaps nothing more. And it’s funny that last year with absolutely no prompting he comes around “suggesting” that I chase money and consider his favored company “Finer Foods”.

img_0189Chasing him around for a job was never an answer. It might have gotten me started on eventually leaving “The Show”, even if I never seemed to put everything into it at first. It just turned out it wasn’t anything resembling a panacea. The right opportunity was going to come for me with or without him. With this said, unless something changes as far as hearing from him again or talking to him I will not mention him again. I think it’ll just be a retread at this point!

I suppose that’s how I will end this story for now. The end?

October

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This is an important month in my recent history as it turns out. To start as I seem to like to drive home often on this blog, this month about four years ago was when I handed in my two-week notice at “The Show”. I would eventually move on to a teller job at “Gotham Bank” only to be let go less than two months later. This would free me up to work at “The Hole” when they first opened.

Another important milestone for this month isn’t a very positive one.

This month marks the end of the “Streak Era” and then marks another odd era. I’ve never told you guys when I got let go from “Fresh Foods”. All I had told you was that I was no longer at “The Hole”. If you remember the episode where Rog led me to the store leadership office, then walked back out and the store mgr told me the bad news happened in October last year.

With what happened to Rog since that time – especially getting demoted from his position as a dept mgr and then ultimately no longer being with “Fresh Foods” – I can do nothing more than laugh about it. I was discouraged when I got let go, but I had to realize I was on my own. While I’m responsible for the why it happened last year because of what happened to my former boss since that moment will always have an * – asterisk in my mind. Whatever happened between then and now, I can surmise that things weren’t quite working out for my former boss as it hadn’t for me ultimately.

With that unpleasantness out of the way, I always like to mark milestones and in spite of that setback from this month last year will always be an important one for yours truly. I left a job that was a dead end and ultimately landed at a job that gave me a good income, good benefits, and of course good experiences. Of course these days I must remember that any job – working for someone else at a company – is only a means to an end.

That would go for “The Show”, “Gotham”, “Fresh Foods” or even the place I call the dine-in show (which needs a new name to be honest). All the same may the positivity continue!

Pondering…

man and woman eating ice creams

At the new job there had been women I have been paying attention to. In my case, it just means I could be looking at them with longing. I like looking at attractive women and imagining how I could shoot my shot with them. Of course the possibility is still they may look at me and discern some details and decide “there is no there, there”.

As with my former job at “The Hole” the new store has folks in the neighboring dept who are attactive kind of like Mary if you remember her. Of course for the most part no one with those “crazy vibes” however some of the women who work in that dept has my attention and they may even somewhat know me.

The cutest one who has my attention we’ll call here Charlene over the summer likes to come in an pair of Birkenstocks and then change over to her work shoes. She very shapely and one thing about her makes me somewhat unsure, she has a piercing on her face. Not a disqualification, but it might give me pause. Regardless she’s a beautiful woman and hell yes I’d like her hanging off my arm.

One of her coworkers I could describe as Irish, we’ll call her Gabby who is generally a curvaceous woman. She would refer to herself as a “fatass”, however, I don’t view her that way. She just has some junk in the trunk and she seems to carry it well. Also very nice, but not as attractive as Charlene. Still I could imagine myself dating her.

Another one still was often in the background and the first to go by the time the rest of the store gets going in the morning. I never really talked to her she seemed very introverted and if my gaze meets her I often don’t get friendly vibes. She eventually left the store to go to another “Fresh Foods” store so at this point I’ll never know if I could “shoot my shot”. To describe her physically she seems like a tomboy she wasn’t like Charlene or Gabby as far as attractiveness. Somehow she caught my eye and then I though what if I tried it with her.

In my dept, there aren’t many young women I could try anything with. We acquired some college aged associates over the summer and one of them I worked with at “The Hole” two summers ago. Let’s call this young woman Val, and two summers ago her schedule seemed inconsistent as it seemed one week she was off the schedule the next week she was back. It’s like she quit for a moment and then turned around and she’s back on the schedule. I didn’t get it, but then again at the time she was seasonal so unless she wanted to stay there was a possibility that once August or September rolled around she’d be out!

Anyway this summer she seemed to have some very late days. When the night shift normally starts at about 3 PM she might start at 5 PM. And on weekends she might be able to come in at 11 AM. Either way Val remembered me from “The Hole” and in talking I found out that when she giggles she “snorked”, if there was an attraction that took it away real quick. Otherwise I would say she was very young, tall with curves in the right places. Though with youth had the tendency to be volatile with other young coworkers. I found out later she quit out of the blue after almost three months, however, she came into our store letting us know belatedly that she had just left an interview. What can I say she’s young, she just quit a job and then started interviewing…

One more and she’s probably closer to me in age than most of the ones I talked about here so far (I’m guessing she’s in her 30s to possibly early 40s). She doesn’t really speak to me, and like with that other background girl it’s something I’d probably have to initiate. She works in another dept of the store she’s nicely shaped bodywise (hopefully this means she works out). She has these nice grey eyes, and her eyes suggest excitability when they bug out. Those are the types I would stay away from as I could somehow sense they could be into drama, but somehow I want to know what’s going on there.

Of course there are others and most of them are young – yeah I want a young one, however, that’s a hard task the older I get. Most of them work the front end and since they’re young I’m not as sure of them. Then again this is probably the time to pursue them before they can quickly damn a man for being worthless. However once I go through the young women in the front end, this post would get much longer than necessary.

So what have I learned? This is somewhat related and something that I have always figured. I seemed to have issues with connecting with women I like (or better yet attraction). There are some women I’ve become friendly with and unfortunately the attraction from me isn’t there. However there have been a precious few that there could be attraction. What’s vexing to me has been if I can somewhat make friends with women it’s easier if there is little to no attraction. And I’ve yet to find a woman whom I could be friends and felt that attraction.

Remember “Hugs” from a few years ago? She’s one example and  what stopped yours truly from taking his shot  was knowledge that she has a boyfriend to whom she’s now married. What I like about her was that she was the nicest and sweetest woman I knew at that point. I would like to find women like her, the question is if I shoot my shot would my relationship with her work. Is there a way yours truly could screw it up to the point where she isn’t so sweet to me? I suppose there is always the possibility with any woman with whom I could cross that line!

Either way, I still feel as if the best way to meet that significant other is outside of work. It seems like playing with fire to express interest in a woman whom you work with even if she’s not directly in your dept. It’s better if you leave or she leaves the job and then its worth shooting your shot. Hmmm, there are definitely some shots I’d have taken with some of the women whom I no longer work with, especially if they aren’t attached.

On the other hand, after reading a post about online dating (which I’ve never enjoyed) I began to realize how it’s better to do it organically. Online dating or dating apps are not the end-all be-all when it comes to dating. I really got to figure out how to connect with women in the real world. Problem is, I have yet to come up with a strategy for that, and it’s definitely time to do so.