giving thanks

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on thanksgiving i consider the fact that at my former job at the cinema i never got paid more to work the holidays. lately at my current employer i had the opportunity to sign up to work the holiday and possibly get double time. if i work any approved holiday i already get time & one-half.

well at the cinema holidays were often portrayed as mandatory you don’t get to decide what days you do or don’t want to work. unfortunately i got scheduled some days i didn’t want to work especially new year’s eve and the countdown at that. then i consider last year when i had no job close to christmas and i was able to enjoy both without worrying about work.

this year i signed up and didn’t get scheduled. that extra cash would’ve been cool, but i didn’t win the lottery. that just means i spent today watching James Bond with my mother as discussed in another post.

also today, i decided to link this blog to a FB account. the account is still under a pseudonym, but i would definitely be flattered if people decided to follow that account. not that it’s necessary since well people follow this blog through wordpress. but i decided it was ok to announce to the world that i’m a virgin although in my own way.

and yes the best courage is doing it under my own name. that will come in due to with the ones i really care about. indeed the ones whom i would trust with this info.

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crazy vibe holiday plans

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NOTE: pic above is not of crazy vibes but of the character crazy eyes from “orange is the new black”. an online tv program i have never watched, however, this came up in google search. i don’t know if this matches the character of crazy vibes or just fitting because of the moniker i used for her.

been a while since i’ve talked about crazy vibes – girl who works in a nearby department next to mine. you know it’s time to give her a proper name, mary.

really neither story involves me flirting with mary or anything like. she such a cute girl and very attractive but what gives me pause is what’s going on upstairs. not frightening, however, if it’s bad not sure i’d want to find out.

a few weeks ago we were getting ready for the holidays and she was served by the coworker who said i couldn’t handle her. he had another coworker in his ear and she proved to be nitpicky where he just opted out. her nitpickiness irritated him to the point where now i declare her his girlfriend. we laugh about it and sometimes it elicits a “f*ck you jack” from him.

much more recently, she broke into a convo between my supervisor and i. we were talking about the holidays and what we were going to do. i noted that my mother wanted to see James Bond. well my supervisor lets her know my potential plans for the holiday.

Mary seemed excited about James Bond and indicates she wants to see it. then talks about a nearby cinema where films are discounted on certain days if you join their membership.

now this is where it involves me. my supervisor suggested i go with her to see James Bond. to which i say, there’s something going on upstairs and not that eager to find out what it is. he says it’s very interesting, perhaps too interesting i said…

so anyway i went down to my coworker later and having had to remind him of who his girlfriend is i told him he should beat me up. he asks why and it’s because i was just talking to his girlfriend. another coworkers asks why we were being so mean. no answer really but that was another “f*ck you jack”.

probably a let down from the stalking episode involving mary, i’ll bet. lol

Another protected post coming

on the thanksgiving holiday. it will be a bit more on my background. it’s somewhat important and at least i have some time for rewrites when i finally do post it. of course women will be involved. lol

if you don’t already have a password e-mail me. my address is on my about page. if you already do have one it hasn’t changed, but it always can at some point.

if you want to see those odd honesty box comments made over the years, they’re coming next month promise. they will also be post protected as well.

excuses

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last year when i was looking for a new job i had excuses. when it came to job hunting i was very picky as to the type of job i wanted. it was a matter of sticking to a familiar business to breaking into a business where there would be better pay and benefits.

that also meant i lost out on a lot of jobs that would provide that, however, those jobs would not be of great interest. my current job isn’t exactly ideal, but i received exactly what i was looking for better pay and benefits.

the same applies to dating. this year is the first time i tried dating sites after utilizing social networking such as facebook to approach women. so far my experience is with happn which unfortunately hasn’t gotten me any results.

a friend of mine suggested plenty of fish, and he hassled me about it for a while and kept coming up with excuses such as i didn’t want to post a picture or whatever. simply my head wasn’t in the game at that point and his checking on me and this website wasn’t helping. at that point in time there was no interest on my part to truly join that dating site or any site for that matter.

now that i realize that in keeping with the earlier post about whether or not i should announce my virginity on any other dating profile. of course what this could mean is that they could see a face of a virgin, unless i chose to find a way to sidestep this issue and there are ways.

perhaps i still need a picture but would still have to be true to myself. i can’t find a picture to portray myself as athletic if that’s not reality for instance. of course i’m talking about not showing my face, just as an experiment.

of course with these dating sites it’s to spur interest not to depress interest. i have a lot of decisions to make about some of the excuses i made regarding these dating sites and what strategies to use to spur interest. most importantly whether or not being a virgin should be the draw.

or is it best to not reveal that info until such time as there is comfort developing between me and her? I recognize not all are into dating or being with virgins who have very little experience or success attracting women. with that being said with trust and honesty comes movement.

what if?

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i shared the virgin thing, not with everyone but those i may have some interest in. the thing about living life socially is that you’re never sure who to trust with the right information. even worse someone may decide they have some information about you and could use it against you.

with that being said, the women i have met over the years online or in person there have been precious few that i could reliably talk to. the “friend” i’ve spoke to for years, however, she may only suspect my status since for the most part when she asks if i’m a virgin there have been denials on my part.

there are other women of course over the years, but the questions how would they take it. that’s my concern, it could become ammo or it could be something that she may appreciate or respect presuming that she cares about my reasoning. not the expectation that i should’ve gotten some by now.

in fact in a lot of areas i’m not where i should be at least where me in my younger years expected to be. hopefully that i’m getting close to whatever life goal i hoped to achieve.

although for now my life goal is to make a connect with a woman and that it could lead to marriage. not necessarily sex although i’m not nitpicking over that detail anymore. there was a time i wanted to wait for marriage, but that time has ended.

i had some objections to premarital sex, but no more. hell i may want it when i make that connection with a woman. hopefully it’s not something i just give up because i really don’t want to be a virgin. hopefully it’s because i developed some form of connection with that woman whether or not we are getting married or even in a legit relationship.

that being said what if i was just up front about it. of course i can pick or choose. or better yet what if i set up a personal or dating profile and use the virgin thing as my shtick. i wonder about this.