I’ve been wanting to tell this insignificant story for a while since it happened on New Year’s Eve. Unfortunately this story can’t be told without injecting the infamy of a man I’ve referred to as the Hustler. The hustler had the tendency to bring up the name of this just as infamous though lame character you know on this blog as DB.

D.B. aka Douche Boy?

On New Year’s Eve on the way downtown to catch a movie before 2019 turned into 2020 (and way before this bug became a problem in the USA) I actually was face to face again  with the man also referred to as Mr. Deranged. OK let me explain again DB, Deranged Barney, or Mr. Deranged. Not to confuse you all, but I wanted to illustrate to whom I’m referring.

So to bring up DB is to also note how often Anthony the hustler couldn’t help but inject DB in some conversations at odd moments, especially since I finally arrived at my new job at the Hole. I told Ant that DB actually tried to friend request me on Facebook while I was still at The Show and I blocked him. Yours truly had arrived at the space that it’s just time to let that character go and move forward. I just had no business following anything he does online as it was sheer stupidity and it only served to shave points off of my own IQ.

Anyway some random mentions of DB by the hustler until the blackout period.

  • I met with Ant one day and we were browsing at a store then all the sudden he hits me with a question: “When you become a manager at Fresh Foods, how are you going to handle someone like a DB?”
  • There were a few times where Anthony either tried to tell me that he saw DB or just decided to make reference to him such as “yeah I forget ole boy. Dude who wanted to be an entertainer”. Usually I tell him that I don’t want to talk about him only for him to mention DB again later.
  • One time he told me that he ran into DB at a suburban cinema stating for the record that he was glad they never made eye contact because he didn’t want to say anything to him. However, Anthony has stated that he doesn’t always try very hard to be bothered with people he doesn’t like.
  • Another time we were going to lunch and we took a bus to a restaurant. I was talking about a young man trying to holla at some hot chick on the train one evening when I was coming home from work. I told him such things as this man was on the train begging for money and was sucking his thumb while talking to this young woman. While he seemed genuinely disgusted and amused with this characterization. His final comment was out of nowhere: “He crashed and burned like DB”.

That came out of nowhere and it shows he had been paying attention to some of my retorts over the years about DB. Another coworker had characterized Barney as something of a virgin who begs for everything but has very little to offer. At the same time, there was literally no reason to bring up that name in that last bullet I brought up. Also the irony of that bullet was that Anthony at that moment had met with me to borrow some more money. Man I was sooo easy wasn’t I?

Eventually these random mentions eventually evolved into “yeah I remember that time you went off on DB” and any variations thereof. I might talk about where I had been at The Show vs where I was at the Hole and where I expected to be. It didn’t matter, the past held far more weight with him than what I hoped to accomplish. Only he knows what that stuck in his head only to recognize how the negative sticks in his memory very easily than the positive. Perhaps I’ll helped keep the negative going and he just fed off of it, who knows…

The last time we met and the last time he borrowed money he hit me with that “I remember when you went off on DB” only for me to hit him with “if I recall correctly you weren’t there that night and if you had been that incident wouldn’t have happened”. Probably true since at one point in time, the Hustler for ulterior motives only he truly knows positioned himself as an ally. Perhaps in retrospect a fair-weather ally….

Well he probably didn’t expect that but tried to explain himself

Anthony the hustler: They told me.

Yours Truly: Who are they?

ATH: The people who were there.

At that point I sit back thinking it was over until…

ATH: So what happened?

He wants me to tell him the story of what happened again! He already knows because he keeps bringing it up and some other parties told him about it. Do you get the idea that he was just fcuking with me?

Anyway I try begin telling him again to my annoyance and all he does as I attempt to explain is him further realizing where the story was going.

ATH: So DB kept going?

YT: Yes

ATH: So were you two about to fight? *using his fist to simulate a fight*

YT: No! It’s over! It’s over!

Anthony responded underwhelmed and we move on to the “last drop

So while he seemed to want to reminisce about old stories involving DB, when I called him about my newest encounter with Mr. Deranged he seemed uninterested. I was looking for a listener and went to the wrong person as it was less understanding and more judgement as in he thought I was cold for not giving DB a response. It was rude in his opinion in spite of the history no matter how many years it had been. Just think earlier that month he was blowing up my phone – while in this instance I did have to chase him down – to give me his latest sob story as far as why he needed money.

Which leads to the very last time I ran into Deranged Barney.

I was on the train going downtown when at some point I was scanning the train with my eyes. Me and DB locked eyes. I had tentatively identified him and it can’t be said when he got on the train. Perhaps it was the same time I got on the train just about two stops earlier or perhaps it was at the stop the train had passed up.

Still, I had just finished recording the scene outside of the train and was about to check my phone when I looked around the train. I see DB starting to grin at the sight of me and as per policy in situations like this didn’t give him the response he wanted. Unusual for a man who likes to make a scene when he’s into something – and with regards to fairly recent history between us – he just got off the train with utterly no word to yours truly. It’s like he finally got the hint, he’s not going to get any reaction. Well only he knows perhaps on this particular time of day he was a tad more rational and I’ve never known him to be rational.

I did look at him again to be sure I identified him. Who knows this would be more footage for my YouTube channel if he had decided to greet me in his obnoxious style. But he just got off the train and never looked in my direction. I went downtown to catch a movie for New Years Eve!

There is one thing discussed here in this post that I do want to discuss and that’s the time I went off on DB. I’m very sorry to say that happened too often, and I have great regret of my behavior. It was a few years before the realization that yours truly should’ve lost his job as a result of that incident. Others had hinted at it and the reason or reasons he got let go and not me are rather eccentric (to say that is an insult to eccentrics). As often stated, yours truly was not very smart to stooping to his level as he was already there. He wanted something and that something was the beginning of the clash.

Either way I want to tell that story which is more than 8 years in the making in the near future. The night I went off on Deranged Barney.

Finally, the Douche Boy reference was random and was introduced by someone who was a tad more familiar with this story. The real life reference to DB well I will never reveal it here, however, Douche Boy is closer to the truth than you realize.

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