The cousin – revisited

I wanted to revisit this episode for a while. I wrote a post when starting this blog back in 2015 remembering an episode where a first cousin named Natalie came home to visit with my mother. Because yours truly can be the “brooding” type I stayed in another part of the house while my mother and her niece were entertaining.

I was on the computer at that point surfing the internet just doing what’s normal for me. My mother felt the need to pull me upstairs complaining that I needed to speak instead of being downstairs uninterested and oblivious. The excuse my mother used was that I had footage of the previous year’s reunion and the laptop I was using was the only computer in the house where my mother and Natalie could watch the footage.

Well here’s where things just didn’t go well. Nat got very excited to see me and while I was very short when she just got so aggressive with her attempts to reach out. I was not feeling this at all, and Natalie was either very oblivious or just wanted to break through. Meanwhile most of my answers to her was uh-huh, OK, nuh-uh, alright. I didn’t want to waste too much of my breath when I was more into cutting this off quickly.

My mother I recall just seemed very uncomfortable as her head was down I noticed at one point. Things took a turn when Natalie decided to state for the record – “I heard you got a little girlfriend“. Well now there was a trainwreck right there and part of the story I talked about this girl I called Nicole and it just didn’t work. Perhaps your hero just ran her away in spite of himself either way Nat decided to get in on this and I really wanted to cut this off. Once it became clear I wasn’t feeling it she finally sensed that this isn’t going where she wanted it to go.

She piped it down and sat back on the sofa, I hurried up and got out of the living room.

You know there were some questions I never answered. Well yeah in the heat of that moment at that time I definitely wasn’t feeling having to discuss what happened with that little girlfriend. She probably didn’t know that this was a very touchy subject and if you will it was a failure that I was still smarting from. Someone told her and she just go so excited and just didn’t know that this was really a negative subject for me. I also hardly updated anyone didn’t see a need to with family I just dropped it, this was one of those things I talked too much about.

If it was so built up in Nat’s mind it definitely was in mine until it fell apart. Not really her fault it was just how I handled it back then. I just didn’t want to talk about it and she was the last one that yours truly wanted to say anything about it to.

Another thing I mentioned back then was just that we’ve had some odd interactions where she guts upset and often I don’t come out well for it. I suppose she has some expectations that once I walk over them she just has a problem. For example, I didn’t know that she didn’t like shrugging – well I need to tell that story one day. In some cases if she had a problem with something she didn’t always handle them very maturely. But then in some of those incidents she was young and I’m betting some of this is her background especially with a mentally ill mother.

I’m willing to bet her own “maturity” causes her to not to be very upset with me. She’ll quickly forget what happened and try to be friendly again. It could be that she just wants to drop what upset her and certainly she’ll drop it once she felt as if she addressed it. Meanwhile I can hold onto stuff for a long time, while she moves forward I’ll turn around and say leave me alone.

Which for most of the last decade after graduating with my undergrad degree she largely has. I’ve been to a handful of reunions in the past decade and I’ve not seen her. I understand it’s usually vacations and when the family plans reunions it seems many of them are last minute. Once Natalie and Nate makes their plains there’s a scheduling conflict.

I did note that she sent me a friend request on facebook and when I didn’t accept or reject right away I eventually saw that it went away. Sometimes I might accidently hit a button whether to accept or reject and don’t recall that either way with Natalie, perhaps she just got tired of the waiting game or changed her mind. If she doesn’t take my actions very seriously, I’m sure she thought about some of my actions towards her over the years.

Oh and let me mention this, Natalie on the surface is very nice. On the other hand Nat has that angry side and its a side Ive encountered on occasion. And on this day at home, she exposed it especially after trying to figure something out about this little girlfriend. I can cause her to drop that happy smiley “mask” sometimes.

Finally another thing to add is that she was on the little girlfriend trip long before this. When my brother got married she started talking about it and had herself a “forced laugh” when she queried me regarding a dance I shared with some woman at the wedding. To be honest I don’t really remember who that “cougar” was but Natalie wanted to talk about it. When she found out I was going to visit another one of my uncles at a neighborhood watering hole she still had to state in a silly way that “maybe you will find you a girlfriend”.

Two of my uncles – one I don’t care for the other I cared for more – likely heard that remark and gave no response. Either they didn’t get it or they weren’t amused. Perhaps while her comment was thoughtless because we were going to a bar. At that time I wasn’t yet 21 and since my uncle at that time was middle-aged who knows what type of women I would find there. She probably didn’t really know…

Either way I’m planning to make yet another reunion over the summer. Perhaps we shall see how that turns out for yours truly. Will Nat and Nate be there this year?

Meanwhile feel free to check out The Cousin and Signals which are the most relevant posts to this revisit.

Reflections

When I started this blog I had a specific vision of losing my virginity before a certain age. Well it hasn’t quite worked out that way. Worse still I haven’t made many of the benchmarks I hoped to have.

I had to suffer some disappointments and not only sexual ones or even relationship ones. This blog often focuses on work, it’s the one thing I know how to control. Perhaps not the people around me bosses and coworkers, but just having a job in general. I figure if a job is nothing more than a means to an end other things will follow.

I found this article looking up anything on virginity. This woman’s story – L. Rosen – is seemingly the most 2020 story ever. She wants to have a child and started off as a 40 year old virgin, then she ran into her childhood friend and lost her virginity to him. She’s still trying to have a child doing fertility treatments although this bug put a halt to it!

It causes me to take stock in what’s going on now. I feel as if in writing this blog I made more personal progress in my life. I had to cut out nosy people who really had very little to add to my life other than leeching. I realize what it takes to be successful to hopefully become a husband and father.

Unrealistically I think fortunes just change, reality is that you have to work to change your fortunes. The scary part as always is just getting the ball rolling – getting started. Waiting has gotten me nowhere.

I never before noted this, but as far as connecting with a girl or with a woman my hope was that it would happen organically. Perhaps I get that magic education or get the magic job, that hasn’t happened. I mention to a couple of childhood classmates that I went to a prestigious university usually no further contact ensues with those women I went to school with. It could be said yours truly got that prestigious degree but has very little to show for it. On the other hand when finally crossing the stage and getting that sheepskin I never felt so useless.

Thankfully I went through a whole decade after leaving Mission College with the work experience and skills that should’ve really been attained starting in my teens. I feel very behind in adulthood in more ways than one to be honest. However as long as I have life, I will not stop and it needs not stop at getting a woman. My life need not stop at that, however, I do desire a family of my own and will continue to work towards that.

So I think I do share a goal with Ms. L. Rosen….

Life’s too short

Initially when I wrote that post a few days ago about “crossroads” it was prompted by a two observations. Often I got to work early and often I take the train to work. One recent day going to work I ran into an older women I recognize on my commute.

She’s a woman who might be more more no less than 50 or perhaps even 60. She’s not unattractive, however, her face shows her age. Her hair is graying and often she might have her hair up in something of a bun, however, on this most recent day she had her hair down. Usually she’s wearing some type of uniform with a tie.

I’ve yet to determine what exactly she does for a job, however, I’ve guessed that she works in transportation especially for an airline. I nix that idea because she never gets off at any stop where she could go to either of Chicago’s two airports. However based on her uniform I just decided that she must do some type of security work.

So she’s on the train sometime after 6 AM as I am taking public transit to work. And this is one reason why I’m at a crossroads. Perhaps I have to decided whether this grind is worth it as I get older. Do I want to be going to work on public transit at a very early hour?

Although hey I figure as long as I’m in good health I would like to go as long as I can because if you don’t you might wither and who wants that. Perhaps for where I am in life I envisioned a lot more than what I have currently. Don’t get me wrong it’s great to be where yours truly is now, but I just know that it could be much better than this.

I suppose in my mind this lady should be retired by now, however, for reasons only she knows she still had to get out and go to work just about every day. This leads me to my next observation.

One day I was getting off the train from work and as I leave the train station I see this relatively tall woman walking bowlegged. She’s moving at an absolute crawl as if her feet or legs hurt. I want to get past but I’m so tired I can’t move fast enough to get past her. I see she sits down at a nearby bench.

I see yet another older woman who’s about 50 or 60 or so. She’s about to get on her phone I see her fat ankles or perhaps her ankles were swollen. She definitely had a security guard uniform on and she probably just got off work herself. I’m thinking that if she’s moving like that she needs to find another job where she can sit down for her shift.

Again it causes me to wonder what’s her story. I told my mother about it and she theorizes that a lot of people who are older and still trying to work made some decisions when they were younger. They made some “smart” decisions trying to avoid really having to work. Then they get old and they have no money to fall back on so at a later stage in their lives they’re forced to find something. I’m sure in their case the jobs they want don’t seem to want them so they get a job such as one in security.

I started going to work late in life. I got my degree and took a less than ideal job at a cinema. It was better to just get a regular income and luckily this was a job I held for a decent number of years until it was time to move on from it. However, it was a job I liked because I definitely liked going to the picture show. And I like working in a grocery store because while grocery shopping isn’t necessarily a memorable event there is an essential need behind it. People still need to buy meat, vegetables, and/or other staples for their kitchens.

I’d rather do both than do security to be honest, I’m glad that I picked my poison and deal with the often unpredictable public than take on such a lonely role as security. However the main thing I do want as I get older is to not find myself in the position where public transportation is my only option and that a lack of financial resources is the reason I take on a job I don’t like in the future.

One final recent observation. My mother and I went to a Sam’s Club recently and when I went to the bathroom I witnessed an elderly man perhaps he was 70 who seemed like he was composing himself. He was at work there and a coworker came to check on him. This old man was still work and probably isn’t in the best of health. Still had to work at his age

I’m working on not allowing that to become me.

Crossroads

Last year I talked about making changes and you never know if you don’t try. I talked about dwindling opportunities and such. This year I also talked about leaving your comfort zone.

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I’ve spent too much time sitting on my hands waiting for something. While waiting for something this year I got sent to a different department until my old department could get back to where it needs to be saleswise. I got the indication that this move was a very rough move and I’m not where it was expected for me to be! 

I’ve had more than a few days in this current reality where I was just sluggish and it shows to those who are paying attention. I try to remember that I have a job to do, but I recognize that my mind isn’t a good place. However, it isn’t as much about the situation at work as its life itself.

I worked hard and damn near got kicked out of school twice to pursue a prestigious college degree and have very little to show for it. It’s time that I do and it’s one reason why I started talking about YouTube earlier this year. The way I see it this is one way to actually use that fancy education.

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Either way, I recognize this is a tough spot to be in during a pandemic. There is some recovery but I have to realize the job market won’t just shift back to normal once we’re out of this thing. I’ll bet the job market will have changed permanently and that you better be able to market yourself very well in order to pursue more lucrative opportunities.

I’ve even thought about going the entrepreneurial route, and the next question is in what. So I think from this point forward I have some decisions to make. The hardest thing about this is to execute whatever plans you can make. My philosophy this year had also become just get started because life’s too short.

I’m beginning to realize this more and more these days. Life’s too short and perhaps I can no longer wait. If there’s something I want to do or need to do just get started and jump on it when the time comes. I just wish I had that mentality when I was 19

wedding season – revisited

I just had to rewrite this post from just about three years ago. My brother got married at this point 20 years ago. It’s amazing how time flies.

A few things I do remember from that period of time. I may have mentioned this in another post, however, during this time my cousin Natalie and the rest of the family were at one of my aunt’s house after my brother’s wedding and they got to talking about her husband Nate’s aspirations.

At the time I didn’t know what kind of job Nate had however I do know he was working for a major company. Somehow I do recall that Nate at some point noted he wanted to do something entrepreneurial – I think a record store came up. Nat had a problem with this and stated how she’d be less of a woman if she accepted that.

I suppose Natalie liked being a wife to a corporate hot shot. And the aunt who hosted us told Nat “Don’t say that” trying to discourage such talk. It’s amazing how I had such a long memory about that and have never forgot that statement many years later. Who knows what Nate’s current aspirations are now.

They didn’t have children at the time and weeks after my brother’s wedding it became known in the family that Nat & Nate were expecting their first born child. They now have two children and it’s amazing to note that both have grown up and their first born daughter is in college. Time flies for sure.

As for my brother, he decided to make a change in his life at that point. For which I’m happy for him, though I noted in that long ago post that back then we were at odds. My mother had noted over the years that in temperament I’ve turned more and more into my dad – minus the alcohol. My brother I feel may well have inherited my dads’ unfortunate disappointment with life. If my dad wanted to move forward he gets sidetracked and it held him up from achieving his goals.

My brother has a lot more going for him in 20 years since he graduated from college and got married. He’s in a great position currently, however, he still isn’t very happy with his life. That’s very sad as I should be the one who’s very unsatisfied with my life. However, I’d like to get into his position as far as income anyway.

As far as our relationship, as you may have already guessed it’s not great and the blame could go on both sides. However, I know that my brother and I were connected on facebook at one point and he deleted me at some point. Used my other facebook to get him back and he rejected that request. So he’s still being funny, but as I got older I recognize that it’s time to do better as far as that relationship.

I’ve got some reason to these days! Don’t forget to revisit the post that I rewrote so that I can go backwards in time this evening.

New Year 2010

My first job the year before out of Mission College was at a college bookstore which had been one of the longest tenure jobs up to that point that I had. It’s what I mostly knew as a worker still trying to establish himself. It felt like a disaster.

The store manager that hired me briefed us newbies on how the customers at a local community college had a sense of entitlement as the government gave them the money for books. However they treat government aid as if it’s their money and as if they’re paying customers. I’ve always known students to be very dutiful as far as getting their books and as always they could be the worst customers. I should understand I had been one and it’s rarely good if you don’t have your materials for class.

There is a twist though my experience at college bookstores is usually during back to school rush. This time around I was responsible for textbook buy back and this could be a pain in the butt that the manager pulled me aside for. Either way I was getting paid while I waited for The Show to give me a call back with regards to my interview in October. Basically I met with them during a job fair for that company at a local college campus which I saw a lot of people there that I will be working with. I’m including both mgmt and regular workers.

I did new hire paperwork after I did my shift at the bookstore one night at another theater that company owned. As I recall later when doing new hire paperwork for the national theater chain years ago it was a nightmare. The man I would later know as our House Manager just handed me a phone with someone on the other end of the line asking me questions for that company’s tax purposes things I would usually skip over on a job application. I did the best possible, however, HM became a jack@$$ for some of his behavior that night. In a strange fit of reading people I know this was one man I needed to watch out for.

It seemed that company was a tad disorganized as far as orientation, new hire paperwork, or even training (though I have the least complaints about training). I hated having to go into an unfamiliar part of town at night by bus & train during the fall/winter. It was a while before I would actually get to see the facility I actually would be working in. When I did training at The Show itself one person actually quit on the spot already grumbling that there were other opportunities she needed to pursue and the theater job wasn’t it.

For the record the only training I missed out on was concession. For most of my roughly five years there I basically learned it as I went. Yours truly didn’t do such a bad job learning concession and had some wonderful people helping me out along the way. Of course as I learned as time went on there will be those who provided the headaches.

All the same the end of my time at the bookstore came when I got my actual work schedule for the theater and it overlapped the time I would’ve been at the store. It wast that time though I indicated that I could still work. The manager thanked me for the help and kind of demurred when suggesting that it would be OK if they needed me in the future. So while I showed up somewhat late for my shift it was actually my last day there forever.

Time for the excitement of working the job I should’ve had either during my high school years or even in college. The first night I worked was a sneak preview as it was invite only and set up for a party. There were screenings for older movies throughout the theater and it all lead up to midnight showings of movies to be released such as Avatar.

I even manned box office for a bit and was sort of uncomfortable and management sent me to the VIP balcony to help. Remained for the rest of the night until it was time for me to punch out.

Struggled somewhat behind concessions on Christmas Eve and incurred the wrath of the immature young women who thought they knew everything. Little did I know different iterations of such characters would continue to be a thorn in my side. All the same I did alright and if anyone though I’d be short on a register fear not it didn’t happen.

I had to work New Years Eve and missed the countdown that I like to catch with Dick Clark’s Rockin New Years’ Eve. Thankfully it wasn’t long after that when I could go home. Even wished one of the managers a happy new years on the way out the door.

Interesting first few weeks on my new job and so many lessons learned over the years. Those lessons had to be mostly social as far as how to conduct myself at work. What I needed to learn at The Show – a place I grew to refer to as $H!tplace – is what informs me on how to conduct myself on the job. Believe it or not I’m still learning however I’m light years away from where I was at the start of the last decade. Believe it or not as much as I would say I could live without this experience perhaps it was necessary. Is it possible to blow a good situation if I just didn’t know how to conduct myself?

Still, working at a theater even with a college degree from a prestigious liberal arts degree was only the beginning and definitely not the end. It still enabled me to truly pursue other future opportunities, better opportunities in the long run.

 

Back to school, maybe?

I’ve largely been talking about change & growth since starting this blog. So far the topic of discussion has often been advancing at Fresh Foods or even for a brief time when I worked at the national theater chain at the Dine-in Show. I’ve gotten the closest at the Hole and even had an interview for a higher position at my current store earlier this year.

One of my long-term goals is to make six-figures and at this point I’ve gone from doing it where I currently now to finding other options. I’ve even decided, it is time to return to school. Should I just enroll at the local community college – where I left without attaining an associate’s degree to transfer to the prestigious Mission College – and take a few business courses. This is something I had been interested in anyway even back in the day when I should’ve done it.

Going to Mission College definitely put me outside of my comfort zone for that time. Ive learned a lot from that experience and my only regrets were some of the mistakes I’ve made. One of those mistakes was depending upon financial aid to keep me enrolled. Would I have been better off choosing a lower-cost option or having my own skin in that game? Would I have been better off with a real plan once I graduated and especially while there?

So either way I like where I am now as my income is pretty good so far. I feel as if there’s a lot more going on for yours truly now than back during my 20s. If only I had the persistence as far as finding employment back in the day. This was the type of experience missing from back then being so wedded to a classroom and even worse it took some time to finish my degree.

Now I feel as if it’s time to step out of my comfort zone and move on to the next step so I can arrive at that six-figure mark. And in addition to taking some courses at my community college for my “enrichment”, now I find myself wondering if it’s time for a master’s. I do have a goal in doing so.

When graduating from that prestigious liberal arts college I had failed to take advantage of student services to really find a job in my chose field. This time around I need to do that so I can truly take advantage of a masters degree. This won’t just be a vanity project this must have a return on investment.

I’ve even identified one program of great interest and will continue to look into other programs. The program I like has some flexibility and while rigorous, seems like one that could ease me into other academic programs. Just pick a field: business, social sciences, humanities, etc. I could still stick with the field I got my undergrad degree in, however, I could dabble in other fields especially if it pertains to what I hope to study.

Since I do have a job at a fortune 500 company I hope to expand the research outside of Chicago. Perhaps take my job with me as I study elsewhere to finish my master’s degree. However I choose to do it, now is the time to come up with my plan and get going.

Meanwhile back at Fresh Foods I wanted to tell about a new posting for supervisor. We lost another one last month and there’s no need to make this a longer post than necessary. It’s a position to consider, however, there are others within the company to consider. Bottom line is we got something to talk about for now and also Jack just make a move man!

September 2009

I was at quite an unusual crossroads 10 years ago. Yours truly was not too far away from 30 and just attained my undergrad degree from the prestigious Mission College. Because I hadn’t really planned very well for graduation I just wasn’t sure what was next.

It could’ve been military, I hadn’t planned to return to school yet. If I did then I really needed a viable plan for that (incidentally I was considering going into teaching as one idea however that was later). Whatever money I had was beginning to run out and since I came back home, my mother was beginning to worry me with ideas.

So I hit up the jobs I’ve had success with at that time such as college bookstores. No bites until maybe in November of that year. Also I got a lead from a real estate blog which enabled me to send a cold e-mail to a company which would later open The Show and it’s funny that actually got me somewhere. Otherwise my first job out of school was still months away.

Otherwise, I still had to figure out what’s next. Had some opportunities within my chosen major, however, those didn’t work out. It didn’t help that my GPA after so many self-created trials and tribulations wasn’t that great. So all I could do to exist as an ex-career student is plug away trying to get my life jump started. I stayed on course for that degree when it was probably easier to just switch gears and move on to something else.

Also I liked to talk about over the years on this blog my teeth. They weren’t yet in bad shape but at this point I already got diagnosed with a gun disease, however, this was the time to really take care of it. I got my last cleanings that fall until I was ready with some dental insurance (“dennal plan”) just about five years later to really get started treating my condition. As far as the relationship goes my mother who largely took care of my dental expenses at the time wasn’t having a great relationship with the dentist (who incidentally went to Hillman College that sister college I’ve told you all about). It wasn’t long before she no longer used them.

So at this point in time I had the optimism of being a recent college graduate, however, it went up and down. There was not a lot of optimism and it almost matched the year when I was actually out of school and my mother began to worry me about finding a job. Just anything and her only excuse was because her elders did it to her.

Man, I’m still learning even now that making plans are hard.

Still by the end of that year things would somewhat begin to stabilize.

Dream

accomplishment ceremony education graduation

I’ve been talking about promotions, making six-figures, and jobs I’m interested in perhaps yours truly has lost sight of what’s his dream. Since graduating from Mission College years ago, I’m still trying to figure out my dream. The opportunities to realize my dream will begin to dwindle.

I remember the year before I graduatedp my uncle stopped me near the end of yet another family reunion and he asked me point blank “What is taking you so long?” Of course this is the moment where he’s giving me some tough love although he made a few mistakes in doing so going after rather irrelevant observations. He was ready to dismiss what I’m currently trying to do at that point because in his words “you’re losing”.

It was taking me a minute to finish college and I will admit my share of mistakes during that time and even lost focus a few times but I was regaining focus to move on. His toughness, when I think about it now didn’t really add anything. After his pledge to “stay on my @$$” I never really heard from him again  – even after getting my direct cell phone number – aside from an e-mail of congrats stating “You’re going to need us pretty soon”. Suggesting I need the family’s charity which I never asked for to be honest.

Aside from that the reason I chose my major at Mission was because I had a dream career in mind. The problem is that well I had no real idea how to achieve it. I never really approached my professors about potential opportunities which was a huge mistake now. I never really approached the career counselors at least for liberal arts majors. I tried to do just about everything on my own, and had a hard time because where does one start when they do it on their own. For me, it was truly a daunting task however the reason I was at Mission College was for the prestige nothing should be daunting for a future “Mission Man”.

Regardless what’s my dream right now? Well when I finally graduated I was depressed by one thing, I had very little work history meaning not much experience with flipping burgers or frying chicken (and I had no desire to). Yeah I got a few shifts in at different periods working at college bookstores or even took part in a research project as part of my major at Mission. Otherwise all I knew to do was just stuff you expect college students do to studying for tests, do research papers, etc.

Once it was time to get out there and find a job all I had was a very prestigious and expensive piece of paper a liberal arts degree. And that piece of paper I had to learn carried no guarantees of gainful employment. I had to prove myself before getting the job and had nothing to present. I was woefully unprepared…

I may have expressed frustration over my time at The Show it was OK that worked there for close to five years. It’s also OK that I have my current job at Fresh Foods, perhaps both are “beneath me” at the same time I’ve finally learned something valuable. One lead to the other and hopefully will allow me to eventually find my dream job. All I can to is continue learning as I go, but I need not wing it as I had college.

Since starting my working life one goal that I had was to for lack of a better term “run something”. I wanted to be a manager at The Show, however, it never happened for me and I suspect I made a few key mistakes with them there. Perhaps nothing I did would allow it to happen for me during that period. I’m glad that based upon how I would’ve gotten compensated and the mgmt team up there that it never happened. I still have a what if in my mind about being a theater manager, but for me to do that it was time to seek out other opportunities. I just wasn’t going to adequately grow there.

Perhaps I can truly grow at a grocery store. Move up in the ranks (I did interview to become an associate buyer earlier this year) and perhaps even go corporate since I do have a college degree :P. However who says I got to make my career in either movie theaters/entertainment or grocery/retail?

Perhaps eventually my long term dream job is to work for myself. Scariest part with this is, how does yours truly finally achieve that dream? What ways can I truly make an impact in the world as a Mission alum is expected to make one? All I have to do is make a move no matter where I am now.

 

Honesty Box feet nsfw

I’m sharing this because this particular young lady is no longer with us, she died sometime last year. I had wanted to admit this to her although we weren’t exactly corresponding on a regular basis other than a happy birthday here and there. When you think about it now she seemed quite cool about a guy liking her feet.

If I had went for it although it was years after the fact I can only wonder now. And even then if I had tried years ago then this would be a long distance relationship. Hell I even suggested in the honesty box of all places that I’d like to go with her to the interesting places she liked to go out.

My activities in honesty box assuming she realized they were all from the same man – yours truly – she admitted that “I’m really flattered, but this is both unorthodox and cowardly”. Yeah, it was.

Anyway here is an example of an exchange from years ago back when honesty box was a thing. And may this beautiful and pleasant young woman rest in peace.

This young woman seemed to be like whatever. I got away with talking about her feet. If I had just come out would it only have meant trouble for me. Pic below may not be safe for work because someone could be uncomfortable with the display of feet

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you said,
if i may be nasty for a sec i just got to admit that i want to press my mouth on that nice foot of yours :/

they said,
My feet! Really? Whatever floats your boat.

you said,
sorry i’m attracted to feet. and your present pic well that looks so tender. lol

they said,
I take care of my feet. For that same reason.

you said,
i’m starting to feel like i’m cybering with you. it’s starting to go down that path. lol

they said,
I am not even sure what “cybering” means. Your level of comfort my increase if you tell me who you are.

you said,
do you care about my level of comfort? lol

you said,
ok more serious question comfort about what? or just in general.

they said,
Its just in general.I always want people to be comfortable and express themselves honestly. Even though the honest box is suppose to encourage honesty. It doesn’t were are talking but nothing is being said. But its not that serious and you don’t have to do anything that you aren’t comfortable doing.

And you know she was probably right. Am glad that she realized everyone didn’t have the same comfort level. However, what if I had been more straight up.

We’ll never know.