Climax revisited

Another critical thing that happened this month during the past decade was my dismissal from the Hole. I call that day now and forever the climax of the reign of error. I wrote briefly about one of the after effects of that period which is yet another mgmt change at my former store in my former dept.

I don’t really want to rehash what happened back then although I do have a story to share about that moment. I relate it to what happened during the past few months and note the similarities and differences. However that will be another time.

I have to say that it’s something that I have to take responsibility for as stated here on occasion. I had the wrong boss to play around with and perhaps I was in a situation that perhaps allowed some complacency. It was something that I had taken for granted, however, once a new boss was installed all bets were soon off. It’s like he honed in on something he didn’t like and he pounced immediately. What makes this story laughable was that the situation didn’t work out for him either.

Regardless if anyone wants to think about one cosmic reason for what happened. Why did I “point out”? Why did I have to be late that one last time? Why didn’t mgmt at the Hole from Rog to Morley accept that delay slip from the transit authority? Those are questions that may never be answered. And again this is something I want to cover at a later time.

Long story store aside from those unanswered question the “cosmic” reason for this very disappointing result is what I have been talking about since 2018. I’ve already discussed yet another after effect of this era which was my situationship with the Fiend has changed. And I’ve also written what I consider now the strains within what I would now refer to as a very odd friendship.

I feel as if possibly remaining at the Hole even in a somewhat diminished capacity would likely mean that perhaps I’d continue that situationship. More requests for money or even more negativity. One I started on a new course during that summer he really ramped up his negativity. Even decided to engage in the diversion of trying to get me to leave for his preferred company and “make more money”.

However, if I suffered an unexpected reversal and had no “decent money” coming in why would I help him? Why would I accept a message to call an anonymous person who turned out to be not so anonymous because he merely changed his phone number? I realize a lot of his actions weren’t reasonable overtime and seemed to change with his moods or even his needs. Why did it take me so long to finally do something about it?

Of course I might emphasize there was a strong possibility that I’d have to listen to his negativity about the bull$h!t that happened at the Hole. Perhaps he’d start off positive but knowing his general patterns he’d probably find a way to question me as far as why this happened and how it happened. He’d be a disappointed father who’d determine that I’m unreliable and what happened showed why. Of course this is coming from someone who never had a real plan that hopefully would propel me forward other than chasing other jobs that would provide nothing more than another few cents on top of what I already make anyway.

Well to change the subject slightly with this pandemic and what happened at my current assignment I suffered another reversal. Perhaps it’s only served to put some things into perspective and perhaps to reinforce what I’ve determined since the “climax” which is that a job is nothing more than a means to an end. One can work to earn money however there are other ways, however, while you’re working why not maximize your potential while you’re at a company. If it’s not possible then move on!

What I hoped would work out at the Hole didn’t which I can attribute to my own complacency and the changes occurring in such a short period of time back then. Perhaps that’s a bad habit that I need to really take care of NOW. This was yet a hard lesson I need to take to heart.

October 2014

I wrote a version of this post back in 2017 and find myself very dissatisfied with it. So I will rewrite it with a very different focus.

October has proven to be an important month and seven years ago it represented a transition from my job at The Show to another job at Gotham Bank. It was a long time coming after two years of job hunting with some starts and stops and frustrations. At this point my search for a job offer was finally ending.

The situation at the cinema was mellow for the most part. Well almost as there were still odd conflicts though once I did turn in my two weeks things calmed down. Some of the mgrs I seemed to have not done very well with even started talking to me again. Were they glad I left for something better? Which is strange, wouldn’t they want to be rid of me? Some of them acted like it!

The coworkers I didnt get along well with – often teenaged girls or the meangirls of $h!tplace – gave me some distance expressing their silent disdain. That’s OK perhaps one day they’ll get the job that they want. Perhaps they need to find out how to get along with people better.

I had a list of things to complete before I finally started on my first job at the bank. To be fair it didn’t start off very well and set the tone until what would happen in December. At the same time there was some excitement or at least that’s what I wanted to feel about my next move at that time.

Who am I kidding? I was apprehensive about this move. It was time to move on from The Show, however, perhaps I was unsure about this. Perhaps I didn’t really want to leave the cinema. Isn’t that strange to not want to leave a place where you were so frustrated, miserable, or sometimes isolated? Yeah it was but then some things to consider.

First off I’d be working closer to home as opposed to near the vibrancy of downtown Chicago. Not to say that was a problem, however, it wasn’t ideal. My four interviews with different Gotham branches three of them were at branches in or around downtown and who hired me the one branch near my part of town. In a neighborhood that was sketchy, in fact a neighborhood where Anthony’s martial arts school was. It was a culture shock to actually work at that branch and experience the slicksters, the problems, well things you expect working with the public. Now I’m really responsible for the money.

Though in my optimism if I could make it at that branch on the south side perhaps I could make it anywhere. Perhaps even go to the main branch in downtown which I learned intimidated the temperamental supervisor Minnie at my branch. Ugh it just didn’t take too long to realize this wasn’t working. My mother’s job was nearby at the time sometimes after work I would hold up in her office and sometimes I run into her colleagues who would note my banking job trying to encourage me. I just wasn’t feeling it…

Meanwhile at The Show as I get on-boarded and do training off site from the branch. I was working my last few days at the cinema. A long time in coming – the victory lap was ending and my last day ever as an employee there.

Once the training was over I went to the cinema closest to where I would be working in the future at the Hole. The picture I saw on that evening was Dear White People. It was an entertaining satire that I enjoyed and a great way to bookend the most interesting era that I was finally leaving behind.

I was leaving behind The Show and I was leaving behind the Streak Era.

Allow me to share Time from the film Inception soundtrack. It’s a great track which could work with this story I just told. Inception was shown during my first year at The Show and is legitimately one of my favorite pictures of all time!

The next to last “drop” 2016

I’m still struggling to come up with a final post on the Fiend so I just simply have settled on this story. It will take place just before the episode election day. It was a nice fall day as we’re having currently in Chicago.

Whenever I talk about Anthony the Hustler/Fiend my goal is to tell that story straight. One thing that I striven not to do was to go on the attack against him. Perhaps the various monikers that I have given him including the more frequent ones in addition to a hard-up old man might skirt the line as far as personal attacks. And I also want to note that I strove not to really exaggerate my stories about him. As far as whether or not I was successful in my writings to stay away from attacking I’ll leave up to you all.

The monikers and stories I have written about him are based on my interactions with him. So a lot of what’s written are real life situations. And as stated before you will see a common pattern with what you read and it’s hard to really do anything with a lot of situations. For my purpose it’s just me collecting and analyzing the data.

Around this time in 2016 I answered a call from Anthony. I do recall that he had been calling and texting and for some reason we never did connect. When we finally did I said something sarcastic about not having a sense of urgency in responding or returning his calls. He had to respond to that wondering what’s wrong. In fact it seemed he was making an effort to read me when he did get me on the phone.

As we were talking he seemed to notice my silence as he starts talking frequently asking “What’s wrong”. He noted my lack of sarcasm on my call though usually when I get into that mode he would often get offended and will express it….like a disappointed father. Strangely on this day I was a tad subdued because if he’s somewhat putting on a full court press – not that he was blowing up my phone though he was certainly trying very hard to get in touch with me not like the later episode One Final Drop.

A few times I had to tell him nothing was wrong but if I was silent I was expecting him to get on with the point because I knew there was one. At some point he reached it which he stated “Another reason I wanted to talk to you. I need some money…”

Boo! I stated.

He didn’t understand in this moment that I had objected to his request for money. However I was going to give him some money I just wasn’t at the mode where I got sick of it although this was irritating to me for sure. It’s not like he was doing this frequently but it was enough times that it was on my radar. Up to that point if he’s getting something from me it was a free lunch. Either way to respond to his response to my “Boo” I just simply told him that was my sarcasm that he was waiting for.

We did meet later and he had no money for his lunch. When I asked him if he had anything he just shrugged. Basically I was paying for his lunch and I gave him some as he termed it running around money. He claimed he didn’t have enough money to eat all he got on this day was $100 that I took out of the bank for him. I think I expected him to pay this back later but then there was other money from way back when that I had expected him to pay back.

He infrequently does but sadly there are moments where he might ask to borrow money again. Sometimes money on top of money he already owes. Either way something was wrong with what was going on and I knew it. I mean I already knew it but just not enough will at that time to cut it off.

When we were eating I told him about the episode Petty in full. He would state for the record it shouldn’t have went that far with the House Manager, General Manager and the young woman Kelly. Then at some point he makes reference to me being virgin thinking it was funny stating how I’d fill my girlfriend up covering his smirk with his hand. He knew he was out of line but just didn’t have a filter, he never had a filter. And just like I said that I should’ve left him on the expressway during the summer of 2011 I should’ve got him and left him at that food place we were at and let him figure out where to get his money from.

Either way later on that day he got his money. We take a train back to my house where he left his hoopty. On the way back we were talking about taking martial arts classes he was suggesting something connected with a church that he never gave me info on. Somehow he mentioned that he had been trying to get me to go to his own martial arts school – the one he decided to ask for money where he just simply stated he needs some money – and then I told him ultimately that I didn’t want to go to his martial arts school. He just stopped as he was about to speak probably offended by that but then kept it moving.

I forgot to reference the episode Applications. This was when he stopped at a store near The Show when he saw a job posting looking for workers before the store opens to stock the shelves. He seemed very excited about it and he later utilizing some excuses tried to get me to do his application for that job. Well I didn’t want to do all that work for him on that day.

Then he calls me on the evening of election day upset over the man who won the election. And after I tired of his repetition over who he thought that man who became our president for one-term was. Then we pivoted to other subject including a brief lecture on how I needed to start dating or the women will start laughing at me.

And then we go to the holiday season of 2016. He called me the day before asking if he could bring me with him to look at some cars – basically he was looking for cars via craiglist presumably to replace his hoopty. Anyway he finally paid back some money he borrowed which didn’t include the money I gave him months earlier. He owed me that money for over a year but didn’t consider an extra bill to pay back the “getting around money“.

That little excursion was funny. Our first stop was in the western suburbs and I was talking about a Finer’s store that just opened in the city – and why not talk about it I’m in the industry. Out of the blue he just decided to ask whatever happened with that. I gave him a shorthand story to tell him what happened again and hoped that would be it. Well I’ve been talking about it all year, it escalated to if you come to Finer Foods you’d make more money.

We get to a man’s house in the suburbs and he was talking about a part that Anthony could get for a small sum. Anthony didn’t want to hear that thinking he should’ve fixed it himself if it was that easy. He was complaining about a cracked windshield and then saw holes in the trunk lid where a spoiler used to be. He got on the phone to someone telling them about the car, from that call Ant told the man he has to turn it down because he was actually getting it for someone.

As we left the area Anthony asked “You know that was a fake call right?” I didn’t think much of it honestly but he revealed what he just did out there. Just being very slippery and finding a way to get out of making a purchase. Although it sounded like from what he was picking at he didn’t want the car anyway. I guess in my experience sometimes it isn’t easy to just say no.

So anyway that was really the last time I saw him until one day in the spring next year I saw him at the Hole as he was about to watch a movie at the nearby cinema. And I also had a few odd phone calls with him where he runs down some of my more negative episodes at The Show. I’d say from that meeting on a fall day in 2016 is where our “situationship” began to go downhill.

You know here is the kicker. Blame me for allowing such treatment, however, isn’t it odd that in some way you’re being helpful at the same time as time goes on you’re the one being treated like crap. It’s possible he thought his behavior was OK and as per usual I wasn’t willing to say this wasn’t OK. And knowing him I could tell him and he still won’t budge. And then he has a problem as it turns out when I finally just “drop” him. It’s very odd…

Domino revisited

Before I get into this post let me do a bit of housekeeping.

I had been trying to write another post about the Fiend and find myself deleting and rewriting posts. Not sure what else to say about that situation. Anything written will largely just be a reinterpretation of the same story. As stated often I’m still collecting the data however also stated what new will come of it as there is really nothing new to discuss. I’ve not heard from him since 2019 and from that there is nothing new to discuss.

I feel as if the next post about him might be it with him. Yeah it’s been said before but that also means it’s just time to come up with some more material to share on this blog. With that said let me get to the main event of this post.

Another thing to close the loop on is the drama from my former store the Hole. Four years ago next month I was unceremoniously dumped from the Hole based on attendance. In fact Ruthless Roger had snuck up on me in my dept to quietly usher me to store mgmt offices and walked right back out before our store mgr Morley relayed to me the bad news.

Oh let me add I do have a story to tell with regards to a later tardy which I will tell at a later date. It will somewhat explain the sequence of events that led to my separation from Fresh Foods during the Reign of Error/Calamity of 2017.

Either way, I’ve revealed to you all that there were at least three people whom I still have contact with who expressed some “relief” that Morley had gotten let go. One of them even referred to him as a d!ckhead. Another said there is a God. And another still just said they wanted to see the look on his face when he got the bad news.

I don’t have the same anger towards him. If there is they’re directed towards Rog based upon his behavior not long after he arrived in our dept. Morley is part of the story of the Reign of Error because he had to relay the bad news. Morley compared to the other store mgr in the office at the time (he was the one I had unsuccessfully interviewed with to return to the Hole) was less than helpful. This was true when I tried to figure out the “red-tape” about getting a buy/receive position as he was also less than helpful and to be fair I wasn’t that forceful either.

Anyway I get the feeling that Morley wasn’t a very popular boss among many. And I’ve told some statements about some statements he had made towards our dept. For example how are you going to make a statement threatening us with our jobs and do so with a very playful attitude. That seems very insensitive and unprofessional.

With that said a supervisor in my current dept over the summer told me that Morley got let go in 2019 because he had failed a corporate walk and was under investigation for harassment. I don’t know what to say about walks other than I have no idea what a corporate executive – usually from Fresh’s regional HQ – is looking for on their visits. Whatever happened on whatever day that walk occurred it turned into the “green mile” for store mgr Morley. So evidently that walk didn’t go well and possibly that investigation wasn’t found to be in Morley’s favor.

Part of me wanted to really ask how he came across this info, I just decided not to push this any further. This was mind blowing information that I told only one of the three colleagues who had issues with him. That person simply said “fcuk that guy!”

I just told him the story about how yours truly found out Morley was let go and my response and he just told me. I’ve told him of some of my interactions with him though I didn’t tell him about my interactions with him when I was let go.

What I did reference when talking about Morley was not only the story I relayed to you all about what he said to us before a store meeting one morning. Also Morley’s justification for my termination which was as far as that final tardy “no one else was affected by it and corporate never said anything”. This was where that supervisor gave me some advice on this, that I should’ve actually escalated this further.

Well now we can close the book on this for this blog.

You make the call revisited

I wanted to touch upon this for a while since 10 years ago was when not only yours truly first ran into Anthony the Fiend. I also ran into this young woman named Candace. You may have seen a post about this, but it has occurred to me that both of their approaches were similar.

Both came out of nowhere. Candace was more flirty in her “first” approach stating repeatedly that “You know you heard me talking to you“. She was being playful at work after I never really acknowledged her greeting on one summer afternoon in an air conditioned cinema. To be honest it was just an irritating thing to be faced with as this came out of nowhere.

Oh yeah I forgot to note the initial episode I wrote during the first year of this blog “You make the call”. It underscores her relentlessness during that summer although as it turned out back then she gave up. She lasted only that particular summer in 2011. She gained some privileges along the way and for my unwillingness to just give her the attention she desired evidently she found ways to make me pay for it later down the line.

The more I ignored her advances the more she may have turned on me. I was just very unwilling to communicate my annoyance with her behavior. Her behavior wasn’t conducive to her desired effect whatever that was and it clearly wasn’t to see me just walk away with no response. To be fair, perhaps I was rude and cold to her and wrong for me to expect her to read my mind. Who knows if she’d respect the the knowledge that her approach just wasn’t working.

I surmise that many of the younger generation of women are a bit more bold and assertive in their desires. Many of them don’t understand that you can’t just treat men the way the women in their lives – presumably momma – treated men. You can’t go out of your way to bicker with them and/or perhaps you can’t just go around chasing them down as I felt Candice had in my case.

Oh yeah I forgot about the comparison of approaches. While Candice wanted to start off as playful and flirty to a guy who basically just met her and vaguely knows anything about her. The Fiend was certainly aggressive and assertive in his approach, even outspoken once he learned of where I went to college and my plans beyond the theater. Just remember the episode where I’m taking him home he clearly overstepped some boundaries to the point where I really should’ve left him on the expressway.

Of course since I never exactly learned Candace’s motives, I eventually determined the Fiend’s. To start he was clearly looking for someone he can mooch off of and as Candice had been that summer, he was certainly relentless looking for any means to connect with yours truly. If he found out I liked porn, he’d approach me on it shockingly letting me know who his favorite x-rated performers were. He wanted to connect as she had tried and in the long run the Fiend had far more success until he left The Show two years later.

What I can say about Candice is that on the surface she was a very beautiful woman who at the time was 19-20 years of age. She had a nice shape, nice long hair that she often pulled back into a ponytail, and personality wise she was very friendly or even approachable. She expressed her anger towards me on occasion as one afternoon at work she tried to speak and I ignored her. She snapped back at me in front of customers just trying to get a response which she got a very tense response and she tried to repeat her greeting. I respond with a quiet “Oh” and that was the extent of our interaction on that day.

I find myself wondering how much different my story would’ve been if I had been more friendly and approachable to Candice. Would Anthony have still interfered – and chances are he would if he could get away with it. Perhaps I would’ve never offered a ride to the Fiend, perhaps Candice would be getting rides instead. Perhaps Candace was also less than honest about her intentions like the Fiend.

Because of who Candace was associated with sometimes I wonder about that. Allegedly a manager called out for her when she no call no show. She seemed to be in with a certain crowd that included my one-off foe. Regardless as it turned out her time at The Show proved to be very brief and she got her privileges while there.

I did note that I saw her the next year – 2012. I don’t believe this to be apocryphal. She was on the train headed further north. I saw some key things from her like a tote bag she always liked to carry, she had long fingernails, I was pretty sure it was her. When we make eye contact she would often just break the gaze. Perhaps she just simply had enough of me and besides I had my chance and wouldn’t take it. So far that was the last time I had seen her.

I hope you read the original You make the call post

Psychology

I’ve had to rewrite this post several times and to be honest it just seems to be a longer post for someone who is no longer considered part of my future. I met the Fiend a decade ago and my “situationship” won’t just be characterized as hell it was just a situation. The situation was just to his liking and he helped created it and yours truly just fell in.

I’ve been told that the Fiend is something of a narcissist. Well I don’t have the means, training, or ability to diagnose him as such. Some aspects of his behavior seems to inform of a psychopath, sociopath or narcissist spectrum. For my own purposes his behavior fall in the line I usually just stop at which is a user.

I do think he looks for people he can get something off of. If you remember he’s said to be engaged to be married. In my humble opinion he does seem to place a lot of value on sex. He wants to know when you lost your virginity and me not having much success or even seeking much success in that area it seems on some level he looks down on me for that. And that’s just a start to perhaps his real feelings about yours truly.

I wish it hadn’t took me this long to recognize that in some way his true feelings about Jack V were never good. It causes me to dispel the notion that we were ever friends. The fact that we even got close was because more than likely there was something in it for him. It could be a ride home or money from me for his needs.

It hits me that I can call him the Hustler because he wanted something. The Fiend is everything else perhaps his reasoning for why he had such a low opinion of me in reality. There were times he told me that he liked me personally and on the other hand he outrights lets me know his true thoughts about me. His true thoughts let me know that he looks at me in the worst ways.

I feel as if I encountered such behavior before perhaps in school. The Fiend will just discard you until you’re needed and it’s not about a final score. Perhaps that’s why when I started my blackout, he continued to try establishing further contact. I’m sure in spite of his negative notions about me, he just had a problem with me not responding to him. Perhaps it was my duty to respond when he comes calling.

Just consider a post I did earlier this summer hearing about him really talking about yours truly to another ex-coworker. He’s probably upset that in his words with no contact that I just dropped him.

Another way of looking at this is that perhaps the negativity he drops onto yours truly is really the negativity he feels himself. This same coworker believes the Fiend has some of his own issues with self-hate. Perhaps he hates his own background (possibly racial), has his own inadequacies (sexual or financial) or just hates his situation in general. All I can say at this point is that all of them are only his problem as far as Jack V is concerned.

I’ve been hearing that the wedding for the Fiend is now off because he couldn’t help but cheat. Not sure if this can be verified independently, however, if that’s truly what’s going on it’s no surprise. Anthony did show that he has a roving eye drooling over women he views as attractive. He states matter of factly how he can manipulate women into having sex with him – like it’s normal – and he portrays himself as not above satisfying his needs with women who are already in a relationship.

Also stated before I just don’t think he has any true idea about being in relationships romantic or friendship. I do think he’s a user whether for material things or just to satisfy his own needs. Beyond that perhaps it’s possible that in reality he’s just a lot more lonely than he realizes.

Oh yeah forgot one final piece to his psychology. Dominance and control are my favorite two terms as part of his fiend persona. One time we were talking and I got smart with him and he raised his voice with “DUDE!” because while I have to tolerate his personality he often can’t seem to tolerate mine. And his next statement was “If you don’t do it to your mother don’t do it to me.”

That was something when he feels as if I’m out of line he started saying. If you don’t do it to your mother why would you do it to me. My response was exactly how I began to read it.

“You’re not my dad” I responded. And he gets defensive saying “I didn’t say that”. The bottom line is that his personality quirk of dominance dictate that I have to treat him as if he was above me. I’m his lesser than and he more often than not conducted himself accordingly with yours truly.

And I consider that fact kind of hilarious when I recognize now that in the very beginning he chased me down and not the other way around. He gave me a reason to steer clear and he continued to come around until he got what he sought. And I didn’t do much pushing back even when knowing what he was doing.

Embargo

A few weeks ago I learned something about the store mgr who fired me just about four years ago, Morley. You may have seen a quick post about that just about two years ago entitled Domino. Right now my plan is to share that information a bit later in a post to revisit that episode.

This information is regarding Morley’s removal from the company in 2019 and was received from a supervisor at work. I don’t know how he knows this information as I opted not to ask any further questions. Just know that this supervisor knows about what was going on up there about some of the managers. The first time we spoke about Morley I made sure to note that he got let go and the supervisor used his thumb to say out! Sort of like an umpire in baseball.

We went further to talk about another guy we knew Ruthless Roger. I’ve told him what I knew although what was omitted was how rough my relationship became with /goofball. Hearing this supervisor, the idea seemed to have been no one liked him. His personality was the type where he needed to come back down to earth and we generally agree that whatever happened at the Hole sent Rog crashing back down to the ground. Another thing is that as a manager he just wasn’t that good and a lot of people picked up on it.

I even told this supervisor that when our store receiver arrived from the Hole she saw me in my dept at the time and wondered “How did you wind up here?” My answer was it wasn’t my choice and her next question “Was it Roger?” My answer to that is yes & no, as yours truly were having some issues and Rog just didn’t give a $h!t. The supervisor just responded everyone knew as in knew something was up.

I even told the supervisor that a supervisor I worked with at the Hole offered not long before getting rehired that Roger was definitely on the verge of getting fired. Basically just a guess, anyone who worked with him knew that becoming a dept mgr wasn’t going to work out well for him. This is why we could call him Ruthless, however, how ruthless was he if he crashed and burned.

Which leads to the next part of this dialogue, I promised this supervisor to tell him why yours truly left the Hole (that promise was ultimately fulfilled). This promise was made because it was recognized by both of us had said more than enough about “Ruthless”. In this supervisor’s words we shouldn’t give him the glory by talking about him. Even if his attempt at moving up blew up in his face, he already has enough of a massive ego that perhaps he shouldn’t even be thought about anymore.

Perhaps this is one way of closing the loop on ’17. It wasn’t until recently that I recognize is as a year of calamity. A friendship that never should’ve happened started to get strained to the point of no return. The job that seemed to have gone very well just turned 180 degree got me dismissed in part due to the mgmt change with my team. My mother still having health challenges eventually retired because she lost her job at a bank that failed. Some unusual turn of events made worse that I eventually lost my job near the end of that year. It was a calamity and a slow burn.

I’ve written about the whole Reign of Error in various iterations since learning Rog was no longer the dept mgr at the Hole. And as far as the more recent series of Reign of Error posts my feeling is there hasn’t been a very adequate ending to that. Perhaps there isn’t a need, the ending is that yours truly returned to Fresh Foods and found out that /goofball got demoted from dept mgr to supervisor and eventually left the company.

Since that time yours truly received a number of accolades in addition to making over 10K associate hours and was made associate of the week this month. If my time at the Hole ushered in for my the so-called big money years, my second stint is even more so and I’m still not done. And another thing is that yours truly cut out the deadweight that only served to eat both positive energy and finances because he had none.

And the deadweight – well he’s been mentioned enough on this blog to be honest – yours truly still has his thoughts about him. Perhaps this has been said enough times, however, it will soon be time to close the loop on that individual as well. Meanwhile I’ll warn you, there is another post coming about the deadweight in the future.

Oh yeah the “embargoed’ information about Morley expect to see that in October which would be the two year point of his dismissal from the Hole. In fact this is what I had told the supervisor. Yours truly was looking up jobs on Fresh’s social network saw Morley’s store mgr job was up for bid. A colleague who was still there had sent a meme-like msg to me and I replied back that the store mgr at the Hole was open. The colleague responded “Uh yeah. Morley got fired on Tuesday for reasons unknown”. This was when the supervisor at my current assignment told me what he knew. It still blew me away, however, you will know in the next few months.

Crisis past tense “shoot”

The post I wrote just about four years ago was really about me leaving The Show. There was a time I just felt pressure the question is from whom. Mostly external, and yet I won’t say I didn’t put any pressure on myself.

This post is really addressed towards Anthony he put on some pressure on his own, but I won’t say that others such as mgmt or coworkers weren’t doing the same. In Anthony’s case he’s stated for years he didn’t understand why I was working there – then again it could be said he doesn’t understand a lot of things. As for everyone else perhaps they felt like I didn’t belong there anyway, they wanted what they wanted for a coworker and evidently I wasn’t it. Whatever that it was.

There was a time during the streak era where I waxed and waned on leaving. Once I made up my mind that certain goals weren’t going to be achieved I no longer looked back. My decision and my moves were’t perfect, but I just decided that it was time to go. While some tried to turn negative that I was there over four years, it was more than a respectable amount of time. It was a stagnant amount of time I was making money, however, the wages were stagnant.

A lot of the people I had enjoyed working with well many of them were leaving including Anthony who left to bounce around at other jobs over time. This isn’t actually a career job where you stay until you retire as in the long run it’s just not lucrative. Anthony’s best advice when it comes to finding another job is to follow-up and then try to negotiate when you know one situation isn’t working. That’s almost like chasing away a potential job offer and lets me know we just weren’t on the same page. Thankfully a lot of the opportunities I had never reached that stage anyway.

What I can credit for this time was that I put in the work. Anthony I will credit him with one good opportunity the theater mgr deal that I took advantage of and that would certainly have been a step forward if it had worked out. The other opportunities that he led me towards that I tried to take advantage of well back to square one. Not to be too much of a “snob” I’m really still at square one.

All the other opportunities were at square one, however, they were at largely reputable companies where at least I have a foot in the door. For example I can say I have one foot in the door at Fresh Foods although I have enough “service hours” to get an award for my longevity. Even made associate of the week fairly recently.

Either way, I consider some aspects of the so-called crisis of 2012 to 2014.

Anthony was noting the dry spell I had for most of 2013. He made sure to note that another young man we worked with (and evidently one he didn’t think much of) was getting more interviews than me. He wanted to know why I wasn’t getting any interviews. What does he care whether or not I’m getting interviewed anywhere or how many?

Later on he noted (while he insisted on me chasing down Finer’s) as I started to get more interviews that I’m finally going to find something. Don’t worry about whether or not your getting the job as employers are showing interest and made up for the previous year’s dry spell.

Another example is that Anthony tried to make a comment where he stated “I really knew there was a problem when your mother didn’t try to help you find a job at that bank”. When I told him that my mother worked at a bank, but I wanted to get him off that subject and tell him this was my decision. Which is true. When I graduated from Mission College, I didn’t really want to work at my mother’s company at that point. I fully expected to get the right job on my own and not have to use my connections. And worse still when I was finally ready to pursue opportunities with my mother’s company my connections meant nothing if the commute to my interview and the hiring manager proved to be a stickler for time.

Of course Ant wasn’t the only one questioning why I was working at the theater instead of that bank. Like I said it wasn’t necessarily something that I really wanted when it was time to look for a job. Perhaps an indication that there were a lot of people who didn’t think I belonged at The Show. Perhaps I was better than than that.

Finally I wanted to note that Ant’s vision for where he thought I should be went from I should be on a yacht somewhere enjoying life. Perhaps I could go to a law firm who’ll pay for me to go to law school. Then eventually as it had been my interest to go to a neighborhood cinema to be a manager. Then doing security, then working at Broadway in Chicago to be a unionized usher, then chasing down Finer Food’s to being an airplane fueler. A lot of those ideas were no thanks but the the yacht thing seems cool and what if I had real calling to go into law?

Well I covered a lot of ground here but to address Anthony’s role in this crisis I realize he had his own self-serving reasons to get involved. There was something in it for him. Perhaps this satisfied his need for dominance and control (my favorite two terms for him). If I was successful thanks to him then he’d believe I’d have to be beholden to him. And even if I did finally accepted a job offer to leave The Show, as I learned later he still found a way to be unsatisfied with the direction I set upon.

Still that brief period of the streak era has set the stage for the era I’m living in currently.

Finality on Finer’s

Over the past six or so months I’ve written a lot about the events of No Interview 2014 or mostly about Anthony the fiend injecting that drama into the future as I begin to reach some form of “apex” at the Hole. It was jarring but I recognize that in some respects it’s still in my head. The reality is that that moment is really over, and it doesn’t deserve much thought even now. It’s not something I had no real invested reason to follow-up.

One reason it’s still in my head is its part of the drama that can exist between myself and the fiend. Another reason is I do consider it a fail. For one thing one reason why I never opted to follow-up any further on this in spite of Anthony’s insistence is based upon his his anger when he “discovers” that I hadn’t followed up any further after being sent out of that store after waiting to be interviewed for an hour (i.e. I got no interview). Of course I can consider that I came along way on a cold day and had no breakfast and perhaps not enough sleep to get absolutely nothing accomplished and I had a nasty old man holding onto that disappointed father act give me a hard time over something that isn’t my fault.

Some business wasn’t taken care of and he showed no interest in my side of the story and perhaps he never saw my side of the story. He probably got stuck on the outcome didn’t go the way he wanted it to go and not only that in being a disappointed father he needed to point the finger at yours truly. And worse still he wanted to ride it until I made it right and followed up. And the most confusing part is that he still wanted to know what happened with it two years later and starting talking about how he thought “you’d like it at Finer’s better” or “if you come to Finer Foods you’d make more money”.

When he’d start his campaign I just remember how it went to get on with them with his insistence and with another part of the Streak Era & another number on the no job offer count. That causes me to think of a something crazy scenario such as the climax of the reign of error. One thing I should’ve learned about him when he’s dead set on something he doesn’t stop it could be a narrative or it could be a situation. It all has to suit him and his needs at any given time.

The bottom line is that I need to move forward from that era. If the outcome of the steak era didn’t suit the fiend too bad, it suits me just fine. I feel as if I’m better off now, the goal wasn’t to get stuck on working at Finer Foods although my mind was stuck on working at a cinema and how was that working out for me. The goal was the leave The Show and Anthony gets stuck on what happened with this opportunity or how much I could’ve made with a job that just didn’t work out for me.

As far as his later campaign. I know I said different things such as he’s envious of my success at the time at the Hole or he just never had that closure (whatever that meant to him back then). Lately I’ve hit upon another thought about this, it was all a diversion or distraction. I would expect he knew full well his campaign wasn’t going anywhere. Although one thought that refutes that is when he’s dead set on something he goes in full blast no matter what. However, I don’t have that closure since we don’t have the ties that we used to these days.

Meanwhile I’m still working on that “Crisis” shoot so stay tuned. If all goes to plan it will be the next post.

Revisit: Dawn of the Streak Era

Let me repeat myself from some earlier posts. 2021 represents the whole decade since I’ve met Anthony the hustler. I told a story of the very early days where he tried to borrow some money and his reward for that attempt was no money and in expecting a ride home he got left at the job. He called my phone left a voicemail and I could hear the disappointment in his voice once he realized what happened.

What I didnt anticipate and perhaps I should’ve was that he was just getting started. That didn’t quite send the message that I didn’t want to be bothered. He still came around asking “Why don’t you speak to me?”

Well let’s skip ahead into 2012 and he put me onto this mgmt position at a neighborhood cinema which is a quick train ride away from home. I was cancelling myself out of that opportunity because way before he came to be about it I saw a posting on this company’s social media and decided I wasn’t ready for this. The hustler thought that I was because “You’ve got the experience”.

That particular summer got weird. The conflicts got weirder this was the summer I really regretfully began feuding with Deranged Barney. D.B. was a lot like Anthony once I pulled back he really starting coming around more. Usually just trying to spark a conversation usually it’s just me looking at him and not really responding. I know he’s talking to me but for a time I just showed very little interest in what he was saying. It causes me to wonder if anyone talked to him back then as I had to learn he just wanted attention which is what our feud gave him.

Either way the mgmt job I accepted and this was where yours truly felt this was a good opportunity to leave The Show. If mgmt is what I wanted to do perhaps I should pursue those opportunities when they’re available. One way to look at this is that this was another attempt by the man I know refer to as The Fiend to pull me in more. Trying to pull me away from Henry and his crew was met with mixed results and later on he didn’t mind reminding me of my ties with them.

He did start getting some money out of me making some weird proposition – a return for a small sum of cash. One time I told him to eat it as opposed to paying me back though perhaps the first time he borrowed me he paid that money back. He actually used that money for a hot dog from the concession stand, he got so excited once he was successful. Another lesson learned he never really strayed away from that programming as it turned out. Once he starts begging and is successful it continues.

At this point I was in a holding pattern for the mgmt job. It was a minute from whenever I submitted my resume via email to some point in August where I did finally hear from the theater owner and finally got an interview. I depended upon Anthony for updates as in why is it taking so long. I had allowed myself to be all in on this and it turned out to be a mistake.

I don’t want to go into the story as you’ll see a link to the original post anyway. I will say that my relationships at The Show was starting to take a turn. From the “mean girls of $h!tplace” to even the hustler (as it turns out this was one person I really needed to push away). It was a place I was finding myself at odds with almost everyone and needed this opportunity.

However long story short it didn’t work out. That interview and the resulting disappointment resulted in a period I now refer to as the Streak Era. A period where after as many as 15 interviews it only resulted in one job offer after over two years. What I hoped would be a home run only was the first at bat in the long run.

Please check out the original post here.

Also I’m getting to work on that shoot post regarding “Crisis” which actually could fit within the context of this revisit.