Disappointment

EDITOR’S NOTE: I had to repost this and needed to add some details. Also forgot to use a title so I just opted to do a copy & paste and repost fresh.

Well I was disappointed to find out that the job denied my application to be “team receiver”. I kept getting told there was a hold-up as far as going forward and eventually my boss told me that I “would be set up to fail if they offered me the position”. They mentioned that my pacing is not good that the load that I’ve been tasked to put away for most of the summer is hardly finished. And the assistant mgrs have determined that they probably would have conversations with me about why a load wasn’t finished and other housekeeping tasks.

The boss also recognized that they hadn’t done a very good job of preparing me for this future role. He somewhat expected the original team receiver to come back to his position. At this point it seems as if that’s not going to happen he might be going to the butcher dept going forward. That’s where he’s been scheduled since he returned to work in July.

A lot of what I did for most of the past summer was not only try to put things away but also help out as much as I could on the floor. We were understaffed we had a few people who either quit or moved on. One colleague went to another dept. So all summer long things have been a bit tight. They mentioned that my “pacing” wasn’t that great and that there was a certain amount of time I should be done with the load. All I could do was try to make my pacing a lot better.

So my application was rejected about a week after I applied. A few weeks later I see another position of interest for team receiver which would take me back to my original dept however at another store. In fact the store where my former boss runs the operation. And what makes this a bit more appealing is that it cuts the commute in half and this is definitely a promotion!

Another thing to consider with being a buyer/receiver is that for the most part I’d have to start early. I hadn’t really done that on a consistent basis in a while 7 AM is hard but try at least 5 AM or in the case of the position I applied for 4 AM. Very hard and yet because I wanted the job I was gearing up for it, however, I still rely on public transportation which makes getting to work that early very hard. I need to rectify that in the long run with my own car as my mother even as she gets older needs her own ride.

Right now I’m just thinking about it as I just don’t enjoy just rushing into things.

Recently the new assistant manager from my old team asked point blank “Do you want to come back?” I hesitated to answer at first and while he was quick to answer no, my answer was for the right position. Telling him I don’t want to come back and do exactly the same thing I had been doing. I’d consider a supervisory position or certainly being a buyer/receiver so far if there is a need there they haven’t posted accordingly. However just as my dept is understaffed so are they which prompted the question surely.

I see as of now the number of positions available in the company as of now from an average of 100 at one point in this state to the last time I checked over 500. If you’re looking for any job now is the time, take one and keep looking for the one you really want.

Meanwhile after these disappointments I’m starting to go back to my philosophy of a job is nothing more than a means to an end. Fresh Foods Inc has upped the game as far as how much money I can make and great benefits and a very easy way of putting food on the table. I just find myself wondering what’s next for me now, finally.

To go back to the well for a moment, for a few months this year I continued to write about the Fiend’s strange campaign to move on to Finer Foods in his words yours truly could make more money. To this day I have no idea about his justification for that. My emphasis was to cut this off and usually my answer was it would take something real crazy for me to even consider it.

In 2017, I think some momentum was on my side though little did yours truly recognize a brick wall was ahead the momentum began to sputter. Before that I was good or so I thought. I had to keep telling the Fiend about this opportunity and it seemed he blew it off. In fact when I tried to tell him I’d be learning about buying he instead steer the conversation to if you come to Finer’s you’d make more money. When he did that I snapped at him but due to his bullheaded nature that wasn’t enough to cut that off.

I’ve always surmised in recent years that if he was a bit envious of how I was doing there and without him it was also that this was just a diversion/distraction. Perhaps he didn’t want to hear my good news. I feel as if it’s very natural to expect those you consider friends – not that he ever was – about the good news. Still as he stated that the mgmt at the Hole liked me and wanted to show me how to do different things, he suggested that I could make money jumping ship elsewhere.

Then I got to thinking about it in recent years, what exactly would I be doing if I had jumped ship for “more money”? Would I still be working deli? My assumption was that to justify more money would be my experience at Fresh Foods. However, since this was never an option I was serious about this was not something worth pursuing.

It just informs me that Anthony had very little regard for what I hoped to accomplish. And if I had seriously pursued getting a position at Finer’s, perhaps there’s a possibility that while making more money I’d be back where I started. What would I have accomplished if I’m still at the same level I had been since graduating college.

Jack V wants to move forward and not stagnate. I left The Show because I stagnated – and often I cited stagnant wages especially and certainly there was no growth. What sense does it make for yours truly to just stay in the grocery business make a few more cents and remain stuck changing companies.

The brick wall I referred to was the “Reign of Error”. In the context of the aftermath of that period was when I considered the job is a mean to an end. That was the time to really explore what else I could do to make money. It’s time to look into those options again!

Crossroads

Last year I talked about making changes and you never know if you don’t try. I talked about dwindling opportunities and such. This year I also talked about leaving your comfort zone.

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I’ve spent too much time sitting on my hands waiting for something. While waiting for something this year I got sent to a different department until my old department could get back to where it needs to be saleswise. I got the indication that this move was a very rough move and I’m not where it was expected for me to be! 

I’ve had more than a few days in this current reality where I was just sluggish and it shows to those who are paying attention. I try to remember that I have a job to do, but I recognize that my mind isn’t a good place. However, it isn’t as much about the situation at work as its life itself.

I worked hard and damn near got kicked out of school twice to pursue a prestigious college degree and have very little to show for it. It’s time that I do and it’s one reason why I started talking about YouTube earlier this year. The way I see it this is one way to actually use that fancy education.

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Either way, I recognize this is a tough spot to be in during a pandemic. There is some recovery but I have to realize the job market won’t just shift back to normal once we’re out of this thing. I’ll bet the job market will have changed permanently and that you better be able to market yourself very well in order to pursue more lucrative opportunities.

I’ve even thought about going the entrepreneurial route, and the next question is in what. So I think from this point forward I have some decisions to make. The hardest thing about this is to execute whatever plans you can make. My philosophy this year had also become just get started because life’s too short.

I’m beginning to realize this more and more these days. Life’s too short and perhaps I can no longer wait. If there’s something I want to do or need to do just get started and jump on it when the time comes. I just wish I had that mentality when I was 19

Breaking News

I just found out over the weekend that Roger – who was my last boss at “Fresh Foods” when I got let go – is no longer with the company. I’m hearing some conflicting things regarding what happened. Either way he’s no longer there and one of the former assistant managers for my dept who we’ll dub Larry is returning to take over the dept. Also this makes it easier for me to try to return as I was in no rush to return to that dept under someone I’d dub Ruthless Roger.

In a post on FB, one of my former colleagues noted that Larry is coming back to be the dept. mgr. I sent her a private msg and she let me know that R.R. had been demoted and gave a two-week notice, however, he left before his notice was up. Of course to write it in short hand R.R. got demoted and then he essentially quit the company. I didn’t ask for more details the music to my ears was that he’s not there anymore. I made sure to note to her; now that he’s gone I shall return.

Speaking of this former coworker, I was supposed to work with her the next day after firing. I had sent her a FB msg that evening letting her know that I wouldn’t be joining her and why. Let her know R.R. was a goofball to which she agreed and referred to him as a puppet. Then gave her a prediction basically was going on in the dept at the time that I didn’t think he was going to last long and erroneously I gave him about 6 mos to crash and burn. Which could be roughly the time I had before being rehired.

Basically my prediction was also based on the idea that store mgmt would see what was going on in the dept especially low morale and they would take action. Realize that R.R. really wasn’t working out for our dept which had been a strong one until recently. So being demoted seemed to have been a sign that he was finally pushed out by his bosses. However on this, not so fast…

Later I had also gotten in touch with one of my former supervisors at “Fresh Foods”. While my main goal was to talk to either Larry or store mgmt about me coming back, we also discussed what happened to R.R. If you will an alternate version of events as stated by my former colleague. He couldn’t confirm nor deny whether or not he got demoted, however, his account was that he never put in his two weeks. So basically he just upped and quit with store mgmt upset with him because he left his position. It was said that the dept was doing great with him in charge. So now it could also be a case of he began to realize this position wasn’t the right fit for him.

Though on the one hand his changes and his need to be by the book probably somewhat caused many in the dept to have somewhat low morale including yours truly. I also learned from the supervisor that R.R. seemed to hate his job and wouldn’t admit it. While the dept was beginning to suffer some staffing issues with firings or even people who quit – some of which were likely initiated by R.R. – he apparently liked to leave work early. This while he often asked associates if they could stay extra time because we were at one point short-staffed.

Either way, I’m making plans to return for sure now and already filed some applications online. I know that I have some difficult questions to answer regarding my attendance. I heard from my former supervisor someone else who was let go based on attendance came back. Who knows if store mgmt went over R.R.’s head to bring that particular individual back and perhaps part of the drastic choice he made to quit.

I don’t plan into delving into this anymore because there’s just hearsay and I seemed to have the thirst to acquire knowledge of whatever drama there is (or perhaps there isn’t much drama here). At this point his sudden departure makes it possible for me to return in the near future. And I need not have the consideration that – and it was at hinted when store mgmt let me go – they could possibly hire me over R.R.’s head. Now it’s Larry who I’ve worked with for almost two years so things might return to some type of normal as they were before Roger arrived.

While I somewhat accept that my firing was based on the situation I found myself in. Things built up until I was in a situation where R.R. was strictly by the book, found myself late thanks to a train that fell behind schedule due to a passenger issue, and basically it was manager’s choice. I fell into the category of manager’s choice and they made a call that didn’t go my way. I’m not concerned who made what call exactly what I figured happened was that R.R. punted the ball so to speak to store mgmt and they followed their procedures and chances are that’s where it went. Although in spite of the fact of the tardies, they lauded me as a good worker. Hell they even counted the points because I did what I could to not be late again and I was close to beating that probationary action.

So anyway I need to look at this as water under the bridge. It always flows downriver to another body of water and it’s time to not worry about the past. As of now while I’m eligible to re-apply in 6 mos which would be up in April, the bottom line is I want to return to work right now! Hopefully yours truly can say that he’s back at “Fresh Foods”.

this time five years ago…

going back roughly five years ago and noted here last year i had an mgmt interview at a neighborhood movie house. as indicated it never occurred to me that i’d never get it. when you think about it the owner i spoke to back then was a bit all over the place.

i was super confident thanks to anthony who was also in the process. he got further than i did and still walked away without a job because the owner had some issues that cost her a portion of her business. since he has a head for drama he found out through his intelligence that the owner wasn’t running tight ship and drove her subordinates crazy.

i said at one point that i really needed this one as this would’ve been one immediate escape from the show as my position seemed to be deteriorating there. this was true due to a variety of somewhat self-created calamities. regardless for this reason and others this was the greatest disappointment i ever experienced. this was one i believed was in the bag until she just came up with the excuse of candidates with significant management experience. it was quite awhile and certainly even after other things came out in the press that i got over it.

i was hyped up by my experience at a downtown movie theater even though i never moved up to as much as a supervisor. i had some experience at least operationally but i was untested. of course i missed out on other things that probably would make me an even better candidate. somehow i got an interview – perhaps with the intervention of the talkative anthony – and no job offer. as it turns out the first of many over two years that resulted in no job offer.

anthony of course wound up not getting the job for himself. while he went forward for the position of general manager…and that’s another thing the posting to her company’s social media never specified the level of managers they needed. the posting only asked for experienced managers. for all i knew she was looking for middle managers in addition to general managers if you will.

anyway he was getting frustrated with a lack of responsiveness thanks to his need to follow up. thanks to the news he quickly found out why she wasn’t in a rush to get back into touch with him. unfortunately what need is there to hire new managers when the business you had was effectively cut in half?

even worse when i sent in my resume to that company she seemed to have pushed the deadline to interview further back. that is she certainly kept me and others waiting until she was ready to interview. still she kept anthony waiting to give him an up or down vote.

well of course with all this in mind i was still there at “the show” for two years, but this was an experience i learned from. never believe the hype and never be surprised when you don’t get the job. always come prepared for an interview – hadn’t brought any resumes with me expecting she’s have my information right in front of her. much later another takeaway was that i certainly showed my inexperience as far as becoming a manager never having that experience.

another takeaway for certain. perhaps  i wasn’t ready for this job and with that in mind if possible never look to another job to escape the one you already have. when you think about after almost two years of looking while at “the show” every interview was a potential escape and ultimately i escaped to a job that proved not to be a very good fit.

incidentally i’ve had other opportunities to interview at least for a theater manager at a national chain – whom i eventually worked for on the lower rungs of the ladder – and of course i interviewed to be a supervisor at a “Fresh foods” store. and at this point i’m largely still growing to the point where it’s possible that i can grow into such a role at the right time and hopefully with the right people.

perhaps this wasn’t a bad experience afterall. also later in wrapping up the storyline involving the show, i would like to explore why yours truly was never promoted at “the show”.

the prolonged job hunt

i wrote about the first interview i had to kick off the two year long job hunt. often i make it seem like there were a lot of interviews and there weren’t. the reality is that there were a few more no’s than i had expected.

it all started with the small chain movie theater that i wrote about over the summer where i interviewed to be a manager. my disappointment and dwelling on that situation. the dwelling made easier because after an interview i kept getting NO job offers…

after the theater manager position fell through the next interview was for a bank teller at a major bank. really it was a phone interview and i felt as if this was an OK interview this was a no.

the next interview was for a major movie theater chain. another OK interview even though in 20/20 hindsight perhaps i turned my interviewers off. as much as i hoped this would end an emerging drought and after an attempt to follow up this was a no!

that would be my last interview until the end of the summer. there were other phone calls from employers and i sent applications. even took a test for the local transit authority but i never connected with them ultimately. as i continued working at “the show” i was getting nothing for my troubles.

there were some people i worked with who stupidly speculated that i wasn’t leaving. my friend anthony was even getting worried that i wasn’t getting any interviews and others had been. he was measuring my lack of success to others who were getting some success. and he attempted to give me some leads that i never pursued because i hadn’t been that interested to be honest.

then by that fall i got two interviews quick. another phone interview for an electronics store and that was a no. i was contradictory in that i apparently applied for an overnight stock position. wasn’t keen on that so it didn’t happen.

the next interview was for another retail store in downtown chicago. i had to go through a phone screen, a phone interview, and finally an interview at the store. all that and by the time of the in-store interview i was speaking with two young women who seemed neutral. hoping for the best this added to the no’s that was beginning to rack up!

my last interview that year was for a major movie theater chain. unfortunately while hoping for the best the interviewers were again neutral and i never heard from them again. i was at the point where i needed a way out from “the show” and the search got prolonged.

so how many was that. management, bank, theater, electronics, retail, theater so six total in the years 2012 and 2013. things would heat up in 2014 and by that fall i got a job offer!

i had one interview with a grocery chain that was expanding and opening new stores in the chicago area. the person who interviewed me again had been neutral and probably didn’t understand what i had applied for. this was where i went through some steps to score an in person interview. unfortunately never heard from them again.

then my friend anthony arranged for me to speak to a manager at another one of his jobs at a retail store which i quickly took advantage of. got screened and even though anthony said i will definitely hear from them i never got a phone call from them and the screen honesty ended suddenly as if that manager realized he wasn’t interested.

then suddenly i started getting interest from banks. the worst interview was with a local bank that where i had a family connection as a close relative had a management position at the bank. they sent me to a bank across the city to interview unfortunately an early morning and it took some time to get there. enough time where i made sure to call to not make my relative look bad. the interviewer still found a way to give me shit for it indicating that they weren’t impressed because i came late for interview. i never heard from that person again.

btw, not very important but i learned the interviewer had been let go….wtf???

anyway the other interviews were for national bank companies. as far as those go i went 1 for 5 at this point. i did get a job at a bank although not anywhere near downtown as i hoped i would. i would be in the neighborhood not too far from home.

the last interview was for a management position at a major theater chain. a huge surprise and gave me some confidence although i didn’t get it. perhaps i didn’t speak the language of the two general managers i interviewed with. so while i struggled at the bank i still fantasized about getting that position even though it wasn’t going to happen.

so in 2014 how many interviews six banks, one each for grocery, retail, and theater. So nine more interviews for a grand total of 15 actual interviews or screens. I did get other phone calls but they don’t count because they didn’t result in interviews. although there were some interesting stories with some of them.

either way even if it took me a few months after leaving “the show” to find my groove i finally did and happily.

 

perseverence

Perseverance

at times i got caught up with one woman and especially one who proved to be promising only to find myself shut out regardless. it’s a disheartening feeling that keeps me from a relationship because sometimes i have no idea what happened. as stated in another post sometimes it doesn’t take much for a woman to say hell no to a well meaning man.

case in point, for the last two days through this dating app i had been talking to this young lady. very beautiful with a nice smile and educated. we seemed to have conversed very well during our exchange.

this was an app where we’d get matched especially if i hit an icon of interest or like. then what did me in was my response to whether or not we should connect on fb. she said she wasn’t a fan of social networking and preferred to get to know people by either meeting them or talking to them on the phone. well i seemed somewhat interested in that and apparently she “unmatched” me. 😦

setbacks like this are discouraging although it’s easier to move on. i can consider that she may never see my face again although she’s only seen an online depiction of how i look. also if she’s just that quick to judge like this then who needs her.

so with online dating or even in person it still takes some form of perseverance with these women. there are lonely women of varying types who shares some of my interests. the question is how will i connect with them and who will ultimately be her?