Timelines

You know I often speak so much about the Streak Era or the Reign of Error or perhaps a bit more long running the Planet Hustle period. There is one era I haven’t spoken as much about which is the Apocalypse Era and surely it sounds a lot more dire to you than it actually might be. Well you make the call on that as it’s spelled out for you.

The Apocalypse Era began in January 2017. At that point in time my mother was out of the hospital and while she wasn’t down and out she was complaining how she just didn’t have any energy. So while she was convalescing at home she wasn’t 100% after her recent weeks stay away from home.

My bedroom is next to my mother’s and I heard her discuss the situation of her then job at the time. She had a financial adviser crunch some numbers as she explained the current situation which was her company was increasingly unstable. The company’s longtime owner had passed away and his relatively young cute widow took over as principal owner bringing in consultants. The new owner who actually inherited the company one could say just was in over her head – you know it sort of sounds familiar doesn’t it?

In any case by 2017 her company was shut down and my mother was ultimately out of a job. It wasn’t expected at least on my end, I thought it would survive and sadly it didn’t. Not only that my hope was that even if it was relatively brief my mother would eventually return to work and it wasn’t to be. That’s why from January 2017 forward this is the apocalypse era.

I wrote about this at the time, this is the time Jack V had to step up to the plate. I’ll have to be the one to bring food home and more so now that my mother isn’t making the bacon she used to. It just had to be noted that my mother still buys most of the groceries, however, she’s not out and about as she used to be. Also it’s a bit weird that she’s still buying groceries as yours truly is currently working at a grocery store and had been since 2015.

We went to a Fresh store in the suburbs a month or so ago and spend more than I ever had at the store just over $60 and thats with a Fresh Foods discount it would’ve be closer to $70 without it. Sometimes it’s not that common for my mother to spend over $100 for groceries. However, you do what you have to procure necessities. In my strategy I try not to spend that much though since I do work at a grocery store it seems little by little I always grab necessities just about every shift.

To be honest though I didn’t take this whole Apocalypse Era very seriously. Perhaps it was just a difficult situation to face that my mother is effectively retired and yours truly has to be more responsible for himself. And as we lead into what became the Reign of Error yours truly faces the real challenge of that emerging timeline which is losing his job “unexpectedly” at the Hole.

I was reaching my apex for that time, working on a new role in my dept which hopefully meant a promotion. I don’t want to tell the whole story, but there is a reason I slipped from that apex. The management change in my dept just didn’t help at the time. It’s safe to say I was starting to run into a real brick wall in the form of a new manager. Needless to say just as the Apocalypse Era was in full swing all the sudden there was a stop in my income…

Watching wrestling there is a character I’ve increasingly became enamored of and he refers to himself as anything from the Big Dog to the Tribal Chief to the Head of the Table. In my own ego I don’t just want a seat at the table, I want to take the table with me when I leave. 😛

Still I’m trying to get into that mindset now although we’re over four years into this new era. I don’t want to get into the mindset of this character who tells his cousin how everything he does now reflects onto him. If he loses then the locker room won’t respect the Head of the Table. The Head of the Table is the one who’s bringing in the bread….

I feel as if without the very egoism or narcissism of this character, and in light of the revelations of Planet Hustle this is the mindset I need. Yours truly has to do a better job of handling his own business and especially at the home I still share with my elderly mother. Jack V has to be more responsible for myself and that means just as the Tribal Chief does, I have to do everything to secure the resources that are available.

When the Apocalypse Era started I still largely dwelled on the so-called Streak Era which marked the drive to find a new drive or indeed my time at The Show. Right now I’ve largely dwelled on the Reign of Error and Planet Hustle. Now it’s time to secure my future in the Apocalypse Era….

Inspired

I realize that blogs can be a means of creative expression. Yes here many of the posts are based on my own real life events. I don’t know if you believe that there is a dearth of experience on my end. However I’ve written about things that has happened and it seems I’m still processing the data.

My last post I shared a track of music from the classic picture Midnight Cowboy. The character arc of Joe Buck – the “midnight cowboy” – is disturbing however in spite of his intentions he’s actually the most honest and true in that movie. What we see is two men – as Buck pairs up with the character of Ratso who initially hustles cowboy – on the lowest rung of society, hustling in a big city isn’t getting them anywhere, and the main characters are willing to do anything to survive. I never actually seen the picture itself nor read the novel on which it’s based, I’ve seen enough reviews or synopsis or even some clips to get the point of the story.

Midnight Cowboy (1969) trailer

Remember two years ago I wrote a premise for an Are You Being Served reboot. It would be more of a comedy although some aspects of that story will become serious. Especially since this reboot is really based on the drama of the time which was my dismissal from the Hole.

So my version of Midnight Cowboy is based on Planet Hustle. My situationship w/ the Hustler and that recent “recently” post triggered this interesting creative thought. It could take place over years and it will be as psychological as Midnight Cowboy is in reality. I just don’t see much redemption on anyone’s part in my story. There is no happy ending there at all, as there is in real life.

There is only a realization, however, the psychological part of the story is how do these two mismatched individuals become friends? How does these two coworkers go from a ride home to asking rude questions to an attempt at hustling – being hard-up and all that – to become a savior to becoming a friend and then back to a point of very little trust again? Is your head spinning yet?

I think this would be a great art house project. It might not win an Oscar nor do I imagine it would make much money in the box office. Hopefully I can create a story that audiences can relate to which would be my main point in this exercise.

I just wish I knew some filmmakers….

Lately as we head into the holidays

Sorry to have not been updating as much as usual. I had some posts in the pipeline I had been working on and find myself less than satisfied with them. My birthday had also just passed so I wouldn’t be too upset if anyone left some belated birthday wishes.

Work has largely been uneventful had quite a few nights lately. Something I’m just not happy with, but what can you do? Options with jobs are largely limited right now. Especially at Fresh Foods, but then unfortunately I can have a one track mind about that…

Of course two of the more dominant subjects on this blog recurring was about the Hustler and the Reign of Error. There’s not much I want to write about the Hustler although the last time I saw his fb page I see him in the loving embrace of a woman. That may mean I may not hear much from him unless that falls apart. I could say he’ll find a way to alienate her, however, allow me to be optimistic and hope for the best of the couple. It seems like a mismatch she is older and very attractive she takes care of herself very well. The Hustler aka the Fiend is very grizzled, I would dare say he’s led a hard life then again he’s always looking for drama so his face reflects that.

My mother is doing OK, getting older and may be in line for the vaccine for this bug. I hope she just doesn’t buy into it hook line and sinker, but hey she is also at the most risk for this thing. I’m just glad that I hadn’t brought anything home with me, though for the most part I have been as careful as possible about it. Usually when I come home I spray disinfectant usually in the kitchen since I usually leave some items in the kitchen until my next work day.

I shared a pic with you all on instagram on a night where I was grocery shopping and beginning to see the shortages. It’s always temporary but it was jarring to see at the beginning of this crisis back in March how bare store shelves were. We could talk about dairy, produce, canned goods, meats, toilet tissue, sanitizer, disinfectant….could I go on. I’m just glad when this vaccine goes to those who need it most we can finally get out of this crisis as I just know there are many who are growing tired of it.

I’m still working on the Climax and sorry to not be as forthcoming on it. My goal as a writer is to be as satisfied with the finished product as possible. Hopefully I get some time off and can finish it soon.

Finally allow me to leave you with the theme from Midnight Cowboy. It’s a movie I’m not that familiar with though I see through synopsis that it has some familiar themes of loneliness or male alienation. I suppose it’s relatable in that case, however, with work that can change. Yes?

September

I had nothing to write earlier this month so it was important for me to share some Earth, Wind & Fire to mark this month and the start of fall. It’s something quite soulful and pleasant. It’s definitely a marked change from most of the music played by the younger generation that I heard for most of Labor Day Weekend. I don’t think these young folks know what good music is.

When they were born at least we heard the music of Tupac, Ice Cube (before he became an actor), Ice T (also before he became an actor), and so many others during the course of the 1990s. Hell a movie was made about Ice Cube as he was at first part of a group named N.W.A. – you’ll have to figure out what that means – that movie was named “Straight Outta Compton”.

Well I’m still working on what I want to write for this month so stay tuned.

Pictures!

For a guy who not only identifies himself as a former cinema worker, but a legitimate movie buff I haven’t talked about movies in quite a while. Well that’s because there theaters weren’t open due to this bug. Of course I made some reference to my employment at the theater many years ago this month.

Also bear in mind that I had an opportunity to return to the industry last year and blew it off attributed to my mood. Although to be fair it seemed like an open call for an open interview and thus even if it was held against yours truly there was no big loss if I never interviewed. It wasn’t a mgmt interview especially and I wasn’t specifically schedule for an interview.

I have this weird idea for you. What if I returned to The Show just to watch a picture. No drama expected I just would be amused to see what’s what since they closed down in March. What measures are in place to keep the public “safe”?

Here’s a rare treat a recent news story about the city’s cinemas reopening soon..

YouTube

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Remember that video I shared a few days ago. Well perhaps I have a new goal which is aspiring YouTuber. These aren’t crazy numbers, however, to have gotten new subscribers and likes and views to that video in a few days time someone is paying attention.

Someone even recommended – and it could be spam who knows – that I need to share more of my own thoughts. Of course I was looking for this video and uploaded it and never quite expected the response. At this moment I got almost 30 comments and even had one hate filled comment.

I suppose what do you do when you find one woman who’s at odds with the message of this video. Perhaps a woman with her attitude is the reason why MGTOW exists. Well that’s not entirely my problem.

I’ve been thanking people for the response especially on instagram and on facebook. Yeah now that I’m on YouTube I’m just about everywhere as Jack Chaste. I post plenty of wild stuff on facebook.

Anyway, if you went through this blog to watch, like, subscribe or comment thank you.

I want to refer you to this long ago post about my thoughts on this video. I had shared this over two years ago and the channel where this video was originally uploaded had been deleted from YouTube. Glad to give it yet another wind.

MGTOW 101: Women struggling to find mates

I just made this upload public today it’s already been liked 8 times & just about 70 views. I’ve been looking for this video out there and didn’t find it, even e-mailed the man behind MGTOW 101 although he’s moved onto other projects since then. He still has two YouTube channels that we might occasionally post content on these days Men 101 & Driven and Desired.

I couldn’t find this on a mirror site well actually another video site that he sent me a link to find this video. Found another video there that I’d like to share with you as it’s kinda hilarious. You’ll have to see later however.

Then I found it through achive.org. There were quite a few videos from MGTOW 101’s long deleted channel. And I found it, though it’s too bad the quality isn’t what I’d like it to be. However, I didn’t create this content in the first place someone else did. I posted this video on this blog over two years ago and it was lost once that channel had been terminated.

Finally I’ve been advertising my YouTube channel on here for a while, I’ve mostly been uploading footage I’ve been hoarding and it’s often nothing exciting. Let me know what you wouldn’t mind seeing me do with it. You want me to share content about my thoughts on MGTOW, male virginity, dating, women, etc.

I’m curious this blog needs not be an echo chamber…

 

Doggos in a park

Would you believe I have a YouTube channel that occasionally I will add a video link to my instagram bio? This is the current link to my account, they vid you see above.

Five years ago (the correct time frame was closer to the holidays during that time period) I was eating at a local grocery store near downtown Chicago and looked down and saw a dog park where a group of pooches were frolicking around. At that time it fascinated yours truly, dogs without a care in the world other than the whims of their owners.

During this period I was unemployed although briefly between Gotham Bank and ultimately the Hole. At the time I just didn’t know that, perhaps on that given day my goal was to eat a quick meal and then eventually go to the picture show. There were a number of pictures worth seeing during that brief period while I was still getting paid from my brief time at Gotham and before the unemployment kicks in.

So expanding my rather meager social media presence I decided to share with you this dog park. Although I’m recording this over five years later.

Also if you’re reading this and have a YouTube feel free to subscribe.

A virgin stand-up???

I found this article just over five years old regarding a comedian who himself has been unlucky in love. This part of his story was interesting:

It hasn’t been easy. Every girl I’ve ever cared for has rejected me. The last big rejection was April 29, 1999. I was in high school, and I was fairly certain this girl was interested in me, too. But her ex told her I was going around school saying she was already my girlfriend. The next day she told me to fuck off and never talk to her again in front of the entire school. OK, not the entire school. Just the drama club. And the kids in detention (chanting “ECW!” because extreme wrestling was big up here and “Jerry! Jerry!” because ahhh, the ’90s). And the dance company. And the cheerleaders. So, you know, most of the school. When I got upset, as one does when his heart is broken in front of the senior class, a teacher grabbed the girl. “Don’t you remember what happened last week in Columbine?” Gee, thanks.

But that wasn’t enough for this girl. She also framed me for a bomb scare at my school. She also called my mom to let her know she only hung out with me because she felt bad for me. As the days turned to weeks and the months turned to years, I realized that perhaps I was wrong. She never did care about me. And in fact no one has.

Ouch! What a piece of work that girl seemed to be. In my case I don’t really know any women I’ve encountered who went to those extremes, however, I could relate to realizing some girl who was friendly with you at first can just turn on you. No warning no anything you’re just worthless to her and she throws a kitchen sink at you.

Either way I share that article with you to note the message for those of you who are virgins. I want to have my first time with someone I truly care about. I don’t want to do it just to get it over with or even to satisfy someone else which a certain someone has attempted in his own interest.

I do it because it’s what I want and as with other things I’ve talked about last year life is too short and I want to get started before the opportunities begin to dwindle.

If you want to know there’s an update and he took a very drastic and desperate step. I’ve hinted at the idea of this earlier last year.

“You need a friend”

two boys sitting on bench wearing hats and long sleeved shirts

Before writing this post when someone turns around and says they think or it seemed like “you need a friend”, they may not always be trying to be your friend. It’s really a jarring thing to be told. It’s really jarring to hear someone who wanted to be your friend tell you that they felt so bad for you because they believed you had no friends.

Well this is one reason why I decided to cut ties to The Hustler. He knew what he was trying to do when he decided when we worked at the theater to connect. And it helped that out of being a good person I gave him a ride home and it enabled him to start probing with the question “How old were you when you lost your virginity?” when I first met him. Either way I was weakness rich enough for him to come in and decide that he needed to take me under his wing so that he can take advantage of yours truly more.

I would dare say he had really been one of the more honest people I met. Not long after the ride home and not long after he had started at The Show he was quick with his hand out asking for money. Which if you read the first savings episode he never got because I left him at the theater as he not only expected some cash, he expected a ride home as well. When he called me and left a voicemail I could tell the disappointment in his voice when he realized I was gone. It was definitely an episode of avoidance.

With this said I wanted to juxtapose something and this was a post I wanted to write. The time that Anthony was at The Show overlapped the period with Candice – a young lady of about 19-20 years old who tried very had to connect with yours truly. I originally wrote an episode I considered apocryphal which may have been when I first met her, however, I remember that episode I really don’t recall who that person was.

All the same when she did try to connect at one point it became “I tried to talk to you because it seemed like you needed a friend.” When she tried that I continued my jackass act with her as I kept acting like Stone Cold Steve Austin repeating WHAT? to her. Almost as if I didn’t hear her though in reality when I think about it now she just came on strong for someone who just came out of nowhere expressing interest with her boisterousness.

So Ant’s and Candace’s time at the Show basically overlapped that summer in 2011. While The Hustler remained another two years Candice would be gone by the fall.

Candice had become the one who got away. And because I never really found out her true motives I really don’t know what they are. I just know that my behavior towards her was very unwelcoming and she was the type that for a time would keep trying. She did snap at yours truly once when I wouldn’t respond to her after repeated attempts. I learned later her good buddy was the one-off foe Missy. She may well have for reasons only she knows genuinely liked me and did something about it.

I now find myself wondering if she’d have been the one thing that would have helped me avoid the time-consuming friendship with The Hustler. At this point I just don’t know, but would being accepting of a rather young rambunctious woman who all the sudden wanted to connect would’ve made the difference with an older man who had ulterior motives who also wanted to connect.

What I do know now is that the friendship I had with The Hustler wasn’t real. He did’t give a damn about anything other than what I could do for him. He would create a situation where I would need him or for him to come to the rescue.

And also who knows perhaps one was more honest and compatible than the other. Perhaps one relationship could’ve happened more organically with little or no manipulation. Most importantly perhaps one relationship won’t prove to be costly. For this I will never know.