Reconnect

adult business call calling

In Hustler I said that my dear old martial artist friend Anthony – who seems to like to beg for money in spite of his big talk – hadn’t contacted me since February. Then he later texts me about a local movie palace that has long been shuttered. He knows I have the interest although in the case of that building there’s not much I’d want to do with it since I’m not a rich man.

It’s him trying to get the money train flowing again. I’ve concluded a while ago that he’s really a hustler. There when you need him but sometimes I wonder about his conclusions. His angles go into left-field to me and I’ve begun to realize that more and more.

In that last post about him I realize I was overthinking when talking about him. I made it about a grand scheme and I feel there is something to it. Then again I always suspected that he would try to get in touch with me again. In this case a txt that I could merely ignore which he notes.

Just think a few months ago when he txt’d me I shot back a “I’m sorry who is this?” and he responds and I never did even if he called again later. He has a history of not getting hints and if I point blank told him it still wouldn’t be the end of it. Radio silence doesn’t always work, he can be persistent case in point when he was trying to get me to call back his “Finer Foods” store a few years ago.

Either way he may call me again or txt me again. When he does I will be in no rush to answer. Here’s another funny thing about that I didn’t realize he sent me a txt until a few weeks after he sent it. I missed it because I wasn’t entirely looking for it! 😛

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Hustler

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I’ve had to realize that an old friend Anthony – my martial artist friend who worked with me at “The Show” – is a hustler. I remember that he used to refer to those individuals who work 10 jobs as hustlers, he seemed to look down on that. Although to be fair at one point since I’ve known him he seemed to be working two jobs. Having done that myself during the course of this blog, it’s not entirely easy!

All the same, remember how he started off our work relationship. All I had to do is take him home in my mother’s car and he started asking questions and he probably was evaluating me. Next thing I know he asks the second question I thought was out of line which is “Can I borrow some money?” He hardly wasted any time doing so and even worse even if it caused me to back off since we just me it only served to cause him to change his strategy. I just wish that I had been smart enough to see that well he wasn’t going to stray too far from his programming.

I had to realize that he always had an agenda. When he caught himself looking out for my interests at work or even when I was trying to look for another job it was often about him. One time when I told him about an interview I got for a competing theater chain he suggested something counter-intuitive to me which was to negotiate and if I don’t get what I want be prepared to walk – and I was like “Huh?”. I don’t know what I wanted yet other than a job offer which needless to say I never got so when he asked about hours and such all I could tell him was that we just never got that. As far as that this should be the answer, if we never went there no job offer is coming at all!

This let’s me know – though years after the fact – that this was really about him. If I was more in interview mode than negotiation mode for a mere minimum wage job even if there was a possibilities for further opportunities at that company then it was doomed to fail. I’d have flopped anyway in spite of my best hopes and intentions and somehow he’d find a way to blame me for it depressing me further.

Not to stay negative on him but if it hadn’t been for him I wouldn’t have tried for that mgmt position at a neighborhood movie house. While I never imagined the disarray that took place there after that interview it was still a worthwhile experience. Sadly I was destined not to get the job whether or not I did well with that interview. While Anthony felt bad that it fell through that this was something he helped orchestrate largely because he knew I wanted this. I never told him the reason but if there was a reason this was my escape away from the place I knew as “S**tplace”.

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His tips that I took advantage of were for jobs that he was working. The opportunities at the local theater, “Finer Foods” (which didn’t work out for a variety of reasons outside of our control possibly), and finally a home goods store near downtown Chicago. Then this leads me to a conclusion for some reason he wants me close to him – and is probably why he wanted so bad last year for me to consider working at “Finer Foods”. All the sudden and with my experience at “Fresh Foods” he tried to sell me on it with a simple “You’d make more money” and with my experience trying to get on with them I’d start coming up with excuses which he seemed to ignore.

Another more potent conclusion with this: he wants me beholden to him. Ahhhhhh, for what he does for me I have to owe him something. Helping me to find a better opportunity – even when I’m not looking for one (especially when for a good stretch I was doing so well at “Fresh”). I could include his attempt to get me to buy tickets for myself and a ex-coworker from the theater which is one could conclude that well he treated that nice young lady like an object to be passed around. Regardless no matter how much he can claim I blew it, he was a lousy matchmaker as we never connected in the first place. Again as much as his need to direct me to his own jobs leads this wasn’t as much about me as it was him!

Also I had to realize that he may just be used to being a dominant person. Bad news is that he’s a dominant person that’s needy. The need is about money it could be he’s generally lonely. I feel he had an inability to connect with people beyond his need to just have to find a way to dominate the scene. So his need to provide unneeded advice isn’t always just directed towards me. He often does this to everyone though he should know who’ll listen to him and who won’t. In my case I’ve given him a reason to think I’ll listen to him even though he may also know that I won’t follow up.

All the same this is why I know he tends to overreact to things. Trying to check me before I make a mistake even though perhaps I wasn’t even thinking about that. Let’s say he asked me to send him something (probably a draft e-mail or whatnot he’s not that good with typing evidently) and then he might come back to me later when I type out one errant phrase. His dominant side also is a clue that he viewed our relationship far differently than how I might’ve viewed it. Perhaps he sees himself as a fatherly figure I could look at him as a brother but he just wants to be more over me than anything. This is not a friendship which is how I prefer to view our relationship. Well most of my relationships outside of family or romance.

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DB? lol

Which also reminds me when we did talk last year and we go onto the subject of “The Show” he often seemed to discuss the negative. He may not understand that I don’t enjoy talking about it, but he does like to remind me about one time that I went off on “Deranged Barney” he seems to like for me to go over it again and again – another irritating thing he likes to do. When I called him after running into DB his response was to throw it back to me telling me I need to let it go and then just say what’s up man how’s it going. Essentially blowing off that I have no need to speak to that man again.

Beyond that he literally does run me down on the phone. From his words he told me that he felt so sorry for me, claiming that I had no one no friends, no male influence, he tried to take me under his wing as a mentor. Bear in mind when we first started working together he already came out to start begging for money. And based upon the knowledge that he had such a pitiful view of yours truly and likes to come on strong he just wasn’t the mentor or male influence that I needed.

And since he seems to like to mention that I’m a virgin – something I won’t discuss with him especially since he started off this way when we first met – and his need to dispense dating advice or even worse keeps recommending women I work with at the theater he seems to have some disgusting habits with regards to women. Granted – and surprisingly – he’s had some success with women that is he’s getting his d**k wet according to him and of course being a man in his 50s has several children. If only the grannies he claims to have f**ked realize that he’s showing their images – no nudes mind you just pics of women he’s connected with – letting me know how much action he’s getting.

Worse image he gave me was that one granny he claimed to have had relations with asked him to pull out. She used her hands to insure a “money shot” across the face. For some reason he wants me to know how nasty these women want it. With that said, why does he pursue grannies, because they won’t likely get pregnant. Though at the theater he did claim that he had relations with some of our younger coworkers who were largely in their 20s. Those silly young things like the wild @S$h0l3s as I now believe Anthony is.

Finally, I basically hadn’t heard from Anthony essentially since February when he called me from a different number. I noted that in another post he sent me a txt asking me to call him to which I never did. I just asked him who he was and he responded, simply decided that he probably wanted something. Thankfully he hadn’t really pressed that he wanted me to call him back since that time. Believe me if he really wanted something he’d put on a full court press and then when I did he’ll just comment hes been trying to get my attention and he just doesn’t understand.

I suppose for now he probably doesn’t need anything pressing – especially money. Perhaps he’s finally sensed that I’ve been frustrated with him. I also consider the fact that he’s borrowed money from me again & again and showed no urgency in paying me back. I realize our whole relationship was him looking to take advantage and keeping me in a position where he can continue to do so. Perhaps as he said he was glad that I found the job at “Fresh” and was happy that I left “The Show” that he just shows the side where he’s truly not happy for me. Perhaps that merely means that he’s losing control of yours truly.

Regardless I still feel as if he may try to get back in touch with me. When I tell friends or my mother about him they say a variety of things. They may say good riddance because I’ve not talked to him since last year. They may say he’s a sociopath and I should avoid contact at all costs. Part of me wants to tell him off which could prove to be dangerous as I view him as a troll akin to my so-called arch nemesis DB. So I’m not sure what the next move is right now, I do somewhat expect that he may try to contact me again!

 

Reconnect

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Recently I got several calls from a number I don’t recognize – my policy is usually not answer unrecognizable phone numbers if they’re someone to answer hopefully they’ll leave a voicemail. So after the umpteenth phone call from this number I receive a txt from this number asking me to call them. The hell….

I txted them asking them who are they? It was Anthony, the last time he did non-sense like this he made it seem urgent – this was the last time he asked to borrow money – “Call me 911”. This wasn’t the first time he sent such a txt, the first time he did that I just txted call 911 not knowing what he meant. Of course this was probably him asking for same, just me give and him take.

So anyway so far I’ve just ignored his phone calls and texts so far. When we worked together at “The Show” he often expressed irritation when I won’t get back to him and will confront me at work the next day. It’s as if I owe him my time which he really doesn’t however he was angling for something during the two years we had actually worked together. I allowed myself to think of him as a good friend except he when I think about it he always had an agenda of sorts.

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Want to know the two first questions he asked me when I first met him? This was a bit unprovoked, out of the blue and shows that he wastes no time “How old were you when you lost your virginity?” Now when I wouldn’t give him an answer it probably gave him an idea. I told him about my background and he’s expressing surprised with the terms “You just shocked me dude”. He was expressing his more outspoken side, but that question actually offended me, the worst part is that I was driving him home from work in my mother’s car. I could’ve put him out on the expressway….

The second question which for a brief time caused me to keep my distance from him for a short period was probably no less than two or three weeks after he started at the theater, “Can I borrow some money”. He gave me a little speech about how he was short and he needed a little something. Like I said he wasted no time.

I told a coworker Henry about it, and his response was to just ditch him. Anthony knew I drove to work that night and was following me around when it was quitting time as if he was going to get his cash and a ride home. I feel bogus for it, but I was just so offended by him asking for money when I hardly knew him & I outright left him at the theater. He did call me though I never listened to his voicemail. He never brought that incident up to me again though I’m sure he had his questions that I never answered.

He did come up to me once and asked point blank confronting me “Why won’t you speak to me?” Sometimes when I express displeasure with something I think he understands I don’t like it, but most of the time he doubles down. Sometimes he complains about my own personality quirks, yet I have to accept his. For example, he occasionally uses pornographic speech about the women he finds attractive. His willingness to talk about people behind their backs as he’ll make comments about people to me though will express irritation when I do the same thing with him.

Remember in a recent post I ran into a coworker Brandon about a mgr at “The Show” Harve. Well Anthony was someone who worked with him and claimed to have helped him get the job at the theater. Harve got promoted real quick and Anthony seemed to have been talking s**t about him, I was like I though Harve was your boy. He never responded though conversely years later when Harve became a senior mgr he was proud of him. As if the s**ttalking never happened, however, if he did it to someone like Harve as it turned out he’d do it to me. Though in my case he would do it directly to my face, not be as nasty about it. In fact it would take the tone of a disappointed father, because I would never play it the way he wanted me to.

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Kind of like what happened with “Finer Foods” last year. All the sudden he kept bringing up that I could leave “Fresh Foods” and go to “Finer” with my experience and make more money. He brought it up enough times where in irritation I just simple exclaimed over the phone “YOU MUST REALLY HAVE A HARD-ON FOR ME GOING TO ‘FINER FOODS’!”. He backed off and just said “no I’m just saying”. Then maybe a week or two later he calls me at work I text him a I’ll call you back later then he txts back “Why don’t you come over here with me at Finer Foods? You’ll make more money and you’d be closer to home.”

While I did call him later I avoided talking about it letting him know at that point how well things seemed to have been going at “Fresh”. He seemed to have agreed and he never brought up “Finer” until that 911 text and he asked to borrow some money. We were in a barber shop and he pointblank asks “Are you thinking about jumping ship yet?” I simply gave another excuse and he more or less doubled down saying get an interview, know your worth, see how much money they’re talking. It’s almost as if he never picked up on the fact that I wasn’t interested in jumping ship.

Though I sort of know what’s going on here. He was never making a suggestion, he was expressing an expectation. It wasn’t going to matter what I said about whether or not I was going to change jobs from one company to another. All that mattered to him was influencing me into going the direction he wants me to go. Perhaps this is always his M.O. even at “The Show” and masked by his own agenda. His own agenda never involved looking out for me when things began to turn the theater job into “s**tplace”. He wanted something and being friendly to me would get him that.

BTW, another reason I haven’t really talked to him was my job situation. If he knew that I wasn’t working right now, he’d go over my head to solve the problem. He’d start telling me about the opportunities that exists wherever he is. And they may not be the opportunities that are in my best interest. Then I remember during the course of the streak era his attempts to help me find a job resulted in exactly three opportunities with no offers. He’s 0 for 3…

Actually while it’s been fairly recent, that I haven’t been working my communications blackout with him has been in effect really since the summer. If it wasn’t about some drama in his life he wanted to talk about with me, he wants to talk about money. The last txt from him last summer was updating me on stuff I already knew with a promise from him to pay me back the money he borrowed. I did call him not long after that left a voicemail and he never got back to me. Every now and they he’d say something on my facebook or instagram and one of those posts I just deleted because it irritated me.

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From Nightcrawler

Finally the last time I called him was about “Deranged Barney” an encounter which I consider a trigger. That’s not someone I ever want to encounter again because my behavior would backslide into the negative as my goal is to never do that again. So anyway, instead of letting me talk this out his first instinct upon asking him “Guess who I ran into today?” His response was “D.B.?” He’s needling me about Mr. Deranged now, it’s been too much of running joke to him and not sensing how not in the mood I was for his teasing he goes into “You really need to let that go”. Instead it was like I’m a bad guy for not wanting to talk to him.

So he wants me to have a vested interest in his drama which are his children. For example the money he borrowed was for his son’s medical expenses. He gave a whole story about how he was asking for money in his family and he really needed me to give him some money. My form of cutting this off which didn’t work was I offered $20 as cold as it is to say this had nothing to do with me. In silence he just quickly shot back man you know you can give me at least $100.

The other drama he expressed to me a year earlier was he told me of an incident involving one of his daughters who he orchestrated a job at “The Show”. Apparently one of the senior mgrs decided to put their hands on his daughter and there was a bit of a drama with that. Since her daddy can involve himself in almost anything, he of course involved himself in this incident with his daughter – and with his counsel rightfully. He expressed anger for a time after this although with him knowing the senior mgr in question he talks about her like a dog but still expressed a pornographic interest in her.

So all the same, not a quandary. He’s given something to talk about on this blog and also I had a nice vacation from him. He might have been as responsible for it as I am, however, now he wants to be back in touch with me. It’s OK if a friend wants to talk to me, but problematic if it leads into, “Hey sorry I haven’t been in touch with you for a bit, however I really need something from you”…

Be part of the world

As I’ve stated already the idea of having sex or otherwise relations with the opposite sex to be part of the world is kind of backwards to me. That doesn’t happen unless you’re part of the world, thus I have to find activities or interests where one could connect with people. Thus you become part of the world and you can begin to find love or sex.

You don’t always find either from work. Or you don’t find either because people keep needing to lecture you about it or just make random comments.

All the same this article lets me know I had been on the right track. Take an improv class or take an art class. Hopefully you find someone you like or they like you though you can learn something new, especially something creative. And yes I know those aren’t the only things I could do to become part of the world.

 

signals

let me start off by saying using a video of a railroad semaphore signal seems a bit counter-intuitive, but i assure you this video is relevant as far as this awkward subject. it’s all about whether or not someone is giving you the go-ahead signal. trains run the same way either you got to wait & let a train pass before proceeding or you got the all clear and the train can continue to move forward.

do you remember nicole? while barely mentioned on this blog or at least her story she featured in one story i wrote regarding my cousin natalie. my cousin took a greater interest in the story at the time than i wanted and simply shut down any attempt at a convo based upon this by offering nothing but silence. natalie who does like chatting kind of got the hint and left it & me alone…

as far as nicole, well it’s a cautionary tale with a variety of tactical errors. and to be fair it was a case of jumping a gun and the signs were in front of me that she was giving me a stop signal. with regards to if i was looking for signals from nicole, i wanted to see a proceed signal and sought to interpret and overthink them to the point where it was favorable. well it never happened and i hung around with her for far longer than i should have…

this was the biggest ouch of my life. i wanted to believe nicole was going to be my girlfriend and my belief proved to be wrong. as it turned out i made a mistake and as a result nicole probably still doesn’t want to speak to me to this day. it’s possible from my obsessive attempts i only served not to cultivate a relationship, but only cultivated avoidance. who knows if she’s ever moved from her negative feelings towards me, i know i still have my negative feelings about her.

a typical post where i talk about the women and describe them physically. this time i won’t, overtime i had to convince myself that although i thought nicole was attractive my view of her has changed and that includes her attractiveness. over the years i have thought her attitude when she wanted nothing to do with me made her very ugly to me. though these days i accept my role in how things simply went due south at the time.

having met her through my first room mate at “mission college” one mistake i had made was assuming her niceness/friendliness was a signal of interest. it was when i decided to express interest and the reasoning that she described it as a misunderstanding which wasn’t what i wanted to hear. these days i try to pay attention when a girl seems interested only to just pull back when i try to reciprocate. my goal is to try to avoid making assumptions in some cases i can be too cautious and a girl with a wandering eye can go with who’ll give her the attention.

another error was situational as i attempted to ascertain whether or not she was going to my campus to play pool i asked her if she was coming over. she was like you know maybe i don’t know we’ll see, then i felt dejected and walked away. someone touched my back & shoulders when i left. i was in a courtyard during a weekly student block party and there was a stairway into a yard with students standing around.

now i figure it was someone else who probably did the touching. probably steadying herself or perhaps himself coming down that hill and i was the only stable object nearby. problem is i wanted it to be nicole and made the mistake of asking her which began to cause other problems as it was an excuse to express interest. she couldn’t say whether she did or she didn’t and i never looked back when it happened so it’s possible she didn’t thus it wasn’t a proceed signal. unfortunately i didn’t want to believe that and held onto it for a long time until fairly recently.

another error was waiting for a signal of any sort and making assumptions based upon it. like one time i was singing to myself leaving “hillman” and nicole was horrified when she saw me. except i took that as a signal of interest because she had a horrified look on her face on that occasion. well now that it’s been interpreted by me as a proceed signal although almost a week before she gave me the signal i should’ve heeded – she wasn’t interested. regardless interpreting these signals as “interest” it caused me to further awkwardly make my presence known.

eventually it was all for naught and someone i didn’t know finally came around and told me to leave her alone. too bad this was before the iPhone and quality mobile photography. it got really scary and reality was it was entirely my fault because i failed to pay attention and heed her signals. i wanted proceed signals, but she actually sent stop signals.

for all that happened then i feel bad because if she knows my room mate whom we’re still somewhat in touch although only friends on fb at this point. he’s never said anything and when sh*t hit the fan i learned my lesson. he’s never mentioned anything about that whole episode with me even though i know there had been opportunity to do so.

nicole as a student at “hillman college” was a freshmen when i first met her as a transfer student. i was gone for a year and a half returned to establish relations which incidentally i had done so seeing her at “misson’s” recreational hall playing pool. when i greeted her and after we closed our convo, she greeted me with a flirtatious look but only after she indicated that there was someone who didn’t like her hanging out with men. i can safely consider this a mixed signal, though certainly for me i saw it as proceed when it should’ve been a stop because she wouldn’t give a clear answer as to whether or not she’s spoken for.

with this said since she was a year or so older at this point and certainly had a direction for her life being a junior when i returned to “mission” perhaps it was a bad time to approach her for dating. who’s to say she already had other things that stressed her out it could be her studies, other men, family life, etc. meanwhile i was just returning and although i was older probably did lack a direction. it’s possible whenever she saw me i lacked a direction and she could probably tell “there was no there, there”. i literally came in with not a whole lot to show for myself at least not at that point in time and that could include the idea of “no potential”.

so a few conclusions. i could relate this to what happened with candice years later. i missed candice’s signals because i chose not to pay them much attention. and she’d directly let me know it was a problem for her when i continued to blow off her signals. basically candice was looking for something with me and i for whatever reason chose to not heed her “go-ahead” signals. i’m a long way from saying this was a matter of caution – to avoid misinterpreting her signals – or just a matter of avoidance from a rambunctious young woman.

with nicole i was looking for her proceed signals and she got pissed because i wasn’t heeding them. the signals essentially was a no-go and i was again oblivious. even had some dear friends at college told me i should leave her alone and even that advice wasn’t enough for me to end my own semblance of a chase. and once again i wanted the signals i wanted which basically was, “come here big boy”. the actual signal was, “get lost big boy”.

candice – i can’t say what my problem was with her. perhaps it didn’t take long for me to realize there was nothing there from me with her. what i say later seems more like an excuse now, regardless at the time she insisted on my attention it seemed a little too much too soon at the time. i don’t know whether or not i can call this a missed opportunity or a dodged bullet.

nicole – only she knows why she wasn’t interested in me. perhaps i wasn’t showing that “mission-man mystique” which is believable. perhaps my awkward attempts to give her attention at one point was a little too much too soon also. could certainly be a botched opportunity or more accurately a non-starting opportunity. sometimes i wonder if this also had been a dodged bullet.

 

Isolation

I think this describes my situation:

It’s especially difficult to find a partner if you don’t like to go out much.

Redditor ShakerJew explained that they think they’ll stay a virgin for a while:

“I have no clue how to advance relationships beyond friendship … I’ve never even held anyone’s hand… I’m not ugly at all either. When I see people in a relationship I just think ‘Wow that must be nice but that is not for me, I can’t have that. I must deprive myself of happiness.’

User another-redditor3 echoed this sentiment:

“Not much of a story really.

I’m 30, unemployed, live at home with my parents and have nothing that even resembles a social life. I talk to friends online once every few weeks or so, but it’s been 18+ months since I’ve seen any of them in person.

As for interests/activities, the few things I’m interested in are solo activities, or male dominated.”

If you’re not interested in checking out new places to meet potential dates, that’s cool. Focus on your own fulfilling hobbies.

Now I got to think, what kinds of hobbies can I get into where I can meet people. Perhaps I can join a college alumni group who will on occasion support the sister “Hillman College”. Perhaps I can take some art classes or something like that. There is something I can get into that will enable me to find this fabled companion or at least meet new friends.

the hook-up

34608175474_d8b6f9ca61_z.jpgI’ve learned how my old friend Anthony has the need to get himself into drama. the drama itself doesn’t really involve him and yet, he gets involved and it has very little to do with him. he’s the nosy neighbor who we may groan about however we’re glad he’s around when we need him! I don’t always feel that way about him.

Another thing Anthony likes to pivot into when we talk is my love life. it’s something he decided to not only comment on one time he actually did try to arrange a date. actually because he decided that I was a virgin – he was right, but I tried not to go there with him – he tried to get me to talk to a number of women we worked with at “the show”.

The young lady in question he did actually try to hook me up with – we’ll call her Greta – he wanted me to take her to the Chicago Theater for a comedy show. to be honest I was lukewarm about the Chicago Theater, when he suggested – more like demanded – that I go to a show at Chicago so thus it was important for me to check ticket prices. whatever they were it stopped me cold and it wasn’t because I was a cheapskate more like it became an excuse for me to not go to this event with Greta.

This wasn’t a knock against Greta who was a twenty-something woman outside of my race who had worked at “the show” with us. she was a quiet and short-haired blonde woman who I found attractive though somewhat “perfectly imperfect”. at some point in the previous year before Anthony’s attempt at a “hook-up” she had quit “the show” and was promoted to manager at another smaller movie theater in the city.

we actually visited her at this theater on the north side, almost missed her as she was setting up the concession/bar area because she had changed her hair color. we even sat in one of the auditoriums there just to check out that venue. and this was one of those Anthony wanted to be nosy days and he was mostly in touch with her. I even made note of her hair color complimenting her.

after that brief visit, I more or less just forgot about her and went back to some form of business as usual. every now and then anthony may bring this up and say are you going i may give an answer but not really an affirmative. he one time texted me about this one time attempting to turn this into an overarching point about trying to be a manager.

what was Anthony’s motives, not certain other than he saw the need for me to go out. it wasn’t enough that i often liked to go to the movies alone – and at that due to my own unwillingness to go the movies at “the show” even if it was for free as an associate. he wanted me to go out with Greta and have a good time out on the town and go out. he really wanted to see me take a woman out or relate to a woman or whatever. after a while for some reason he moved on to some other things and forgot about this event he wanted me to go to.

that was until Greta called him to ask about this event. i suppose she was starved for updates also and more so than i had been. so he checked on the available seats and saw that they had been diminished considerably. disappointed – and with him trying to reassure her – she just simply told him “I’ll talk to you later” and hung up. and guess who he called after that….

He had already called me earlier on that particular day and we never talked about this comedy show. so after Greta called him he immediately called me to yell at me because it was my fault that we burned a bridge with her. in failing to cover this event in Anthony’s word what i did wasn’t cool. the reality, even if Anthony thought he broke through, I really had little interest in this event in the first place. if i was going out with anyone I’d be more than happy to make my own plans! I never told him this but he probably didn’t really factor in my apparent level of interest in this.

it almost reminds me of how he somewhat campaigned to get me up to his “finer foods” store on the north side, especially after getting blown off by his store manager after almost an hour. it never occurred to him that I lost interest after that and he still felt as if i should’ve followed up on this. and then when i moved on from “the show” ultimately to “fresh foods” he started his campaign again with the idea that yours truly would like “finer foods” better and because of my experience i would make more money. so he still pivoted into my business as far as making a move that could net more more pay!

these days he finds a way to bring this up now. when he borrowed money from me he still insists that yours truly blew it with greta. and i kept asking him “blew what?” and he didn’t mind stating repeatedly “you blew it with her”. of course before that there were other situations where he brought it up, bottom line is that he felt as if my actions helped burn a bridge with her. he made it a lot more than i thought it was at the time and for some dumb reason i have a tough time even accepting this.

i could put this situation in the same vein as the one with candice. though in candice’s case she was far more aggressive about it than greta was. i suppose that was the turnoff with candice more than anything. in the case of greta it was more third-party meddling that made things far more interesting. either way both situations became something i wasn’t very comfortable with and it was easier to do nothing when in doubt than to simply take advantage.