change

i used to say you can find yourself in a good situation and you can always lose it. you say that thinking it braces you from the impact of what happens, and then it happens. in this case losing your job which happened to me recently at “fresh foods”.

perhaps i believe i’m more than capable of handling any problem as you see from the body of work on this blog, it’s not always true. in this case i couldn’t handle the new situation at work, a new manager with a new team. i didn’t trust them and they didn’t keep me from losing my job.

in writing this post i could talk about the grumbling from some of my now former coworkers. i can take it with a grain of salt now or perhaps not because it cost me my job. perhaps i was starting to be a grumbler as i had been at “the show”. when things aren’t going well i can be a grumbler just complain and get in the drama though in this case it’s not little teeny-bopper drama because I don’t know any better.

today on the train i ran into one of my former colleagues at “fresh foods” and without telling him what happened with me i asked him how’s it going up there. my expectation – genuinely perhaps some positive changes – he simply said “same old bullshi*t”. the new regime hasn’t changed yet, the situation hasn’t settled down though he hopes it does for the best – to which i simply crossed my fingers and hoped for the best with him.

what i told him when he mentioned the B.S. is “this is why i’m gone!” though i wanted to emphasize that i had the best job of my life and i blew it. in doing my best to adjust to a difficult situation i still didn’t do my best to adjust to it. i was just another worker at the end of the day that mgmt had to let go. they were right i did place myself into that situation getting onto an attendance probation where i couldn’t be late for six months and it just had to be one more time – which was out of my hands.

i asked my former colleague about my replacement on receiving another colleague who wanted to learn about buying. my former colleague said he’s still doing receiving though they have him back and forth between the sales floor schedule-wise. supposedly he was supposed to have been given a raise – just as i hoped to get the position of receiver and just like me – he evidently didn’t get it. the new boss who i’ll call roger didn’t pull through and my colleague who’s a math nerd and a wrestling fan i’m sure told because he can be vocal.

so right now what about yours truly? well i intend to reapply in six months. in light of what happened and how i feel about the new regime because of how it all ended i don’t know if i want to go back to that store assuming things haven’t settled down. it would be ok with me to apply at other stores than the one i had the chance to know. thankfully i’m allowed the opportunity to return…

now i do have my feelings about roger and don’t intend to demonize him. i will say that after perhaps a month of him being the new dept. mgr. i realized that i wasn’t feeling him. perhaps he had the same feeling about me. there’s a reason i don’t trust him and perhaps there’s a reason he doesn’t trust me.

if i couldn’t be on time, it gave him the ammunition. he may well have had a scrutinizing eye which i feel he had towards me at least. i also recognize that as a new mgr he had the right to make some changes and he made them. i could get on board or get out the way and to be sure some of those changes got me in the situation i was in.

perhaps i’ll talk about them more at length. this post had to be about me tonight! there are some lessons i need to learn from this, and I WILL figure it out!

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the one-off foe is back

IMG_0998in continuing to wrap up the storyline about my time at “the show” i’m going to revisit that one-off foe missy. then we may explore one more time what happened with her good buddy candace who decided that “i need friend” during her time trying to talk to me.

for a good number of years missy had left me with some unease. missy was a young woman of no more than 19-20 and was aggressive. it would be attributed to her age more than anything. it may just be her natural inclination.

evidence of her aggression to start she was very take change. my gut tells me that she wanted to be a manager and someone on mgmt level put that idea in her head. with this in mind she got herself involved in situations that required the presence of a manager. not only that there were situations where i pushed back and she didn’t handle this very well. she would get pissed though remembers that she could run to a manager and hopefully settle it. only thing is the more she engaged in that behavior the more i’d just withdraw from her.

with this in mind one situation that i’ve only heard about from one of the supervisors at work involved a call from one of the auditoriums at work. an associate called for a manager to their theater and missy was the one who responded to the call. talk about being very take charge and certainly a case of well this is the position she wanted. she was very willing to act the part even if she never got the position before she quit.

now this leads me to one reason i think she started power tripping especially when i used my sarcasm to push back against her. rumors had been going around not long before or after she had left that allegedly she was having an affair with the house manager. i suppose that when you’re flirting and banging some things are said that may or may not happen in this case i’m going to make you a supervisor.

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anyway when henry left the theater – close to three years after missy left – he decided to repeat this rumor with me and a newer coworker on a trash run. he was generally talking about the many dramas at the show of which missy was one.

henry: *to me* you remember “missy” when she had that affair with [house manager]

yours truly: *to henry* oh that BITCH….oh i’m sorry….i can’t, can’t stand that girl

henry: the thing is she really was a bitch because she ran to [house manager] for every little issue

yours truly: *to henry* it was going around at the time that she was trying to make manager

henry: yeah!

missy was pretty infamous in my mind and is the single most ugliest woman personality wise i have ever met. and with this in mind this was a slow burn. the best part of this story is that if she was seeking something in trying very hard at various points to make me look bad, she largely failed. she may have succeeded in making me look bad but she really got nothing out of it.

one time i pushed back after she tried to tell me that i need to reuse that bag because they count them. it’s her being take change and i didn’t like that. she didn’t like the fact that i got “smart” with her. and later she told a manager about my behavior. i responded to her take charge behavior, however, she wasn’t wrong i gave the customer a bag that wasn’t warm. my mistake.

another time i was returning from my 30 min break and missy standing outside of the box office area was keen on telling me that i needed to hurry up and clock back in. i was on my phone just as i was about to clock back in, besides there was a reason i surfaced to return to work so i simply brushed by her without a word. basically she placed her arm across the door letting me know “don’t ignore me”. i was like oh ok uninterested in a confrontation that she wanted to initiate. later i yelled at her for trying to tell me if i mark a bill i didn’t have to find a manager. even though which was my point that could be better stated that i still needed a manager to check large bills whether or not the bill was marked with a counterfeit marker.

the last and worst confrontation happened later that summer and it was based on an over-reaction. but i really wasn’t feeling her need to be take charge. i didn’t report her for the aggressive and obnoxious behavior she displayed when a movie let out. it all started when she tried to tell me to to collect 3D glasses – and only after everyone else assumed i was supposed to be doing it and the thing is while i did it for those movies i was cleaning no one told me to collect all 3D glasses. i just walked off on her and she immediately found the nearest manager.

she kept trying to confront me and i wouldn’t speak. one of the supervisors starting getting concerned because missy – told one of them about it. she even threatened me by stating “i better not see you on roosevelt road!” even after that and as i walked off on her and she was looking for things to criticize me on the next thing she did was find the nearest manager and say something else. she especially saw when they pulled me into the office.

i’m not sure i was in trouble when they did. h.m and another senior manager wanted to know if i was ok and what was going on. and established that i wasn’t really caring for one of the workers who decided to really target me because i wasn’t going to talk to her on that day. and they were following me around after that until i got off later. missy had left the building after i paid a visit to the office.

another time after that missy had came to the theater to watch a movie and upon seeing me walking back to box decided to speak.

missy: hey jack!

yours truly: *stops for a second and then keeps walking to register*

missy: so you’re not going to speak to me jack….ok it’s cool! *she then proceeds to talk about some earlier incident involving me at that moment to another coworker*

to which btw, there were nothing but serious tactical errors on my part with her. one major one she attempted to blow up at work that i poked her on fb and she friend requested me. man she kept talking about it at work and didn’t mind saying “don’t act like you don’t poke me on fb”. for the most part i never really went there with her although i have told some people i did this without really knowing who it was. this was just another dumb drama she wanted to start and i gave that one to her on a silver platter. although it more or less upset her when i really did nothing with this.

in fact there was one other incident where she got mad because she was talking to me and i kept walking. we both were doing our rounds one evening when she apparently heard from mischievous coworkers that i didn’t care for her. she tried to say i was funny and tried to engage me, i just went inside a theater to give it a quick check and she comes in after me to confront me. starting with “didn’t you hear me talking to you” before softening up and quietly leaving.

the less i interacted with her in spite of her taking shots at me – for example “this is jack, he won’t acknowledge me in anyway….see” as i walk away from her with no word while she speaks to a new employee. she often says something about my smart mouth although i stopped when she made her threats at that point i had nothing more i needed to say to her. eventually she just shut down on me, no words at all would cross paths between us. just as i stopped communicating with her she eventually stopped. nothing she was saying whether aggressively or softly i just refused to respond because i knew if i said the right thing she’d get triggered.

twice i was face to face with her at “the show” before i finally left. to start i took care of her as a customer and i didn’t really speak to her as i did to both her and her two friends. and she didn’t say much to me either almost as if i wasn’t there, but this was better than her being nasty towards me. the last time was shortly before i left in 2014, she was leaving her movie with a group around her she looked at me and then re-fixed her gaze passed me. i backed up not because of her but certainly because there was a crowd leaving the movie at that time.

remember i said she friended me right, eventually a few years i’d drop her from fb. she stopped talking about the poking at least where i could hear her. and she never got promoted and rumor had it that the rumors killed that possibility. also rumor had it she handed in her two weeks without actually landing a job although someone mentioned that she moved onto a bank.

btw, i have to mention this the one time i took care of her as a customer she made sure to talk to someone she did get along with. first thing she asked about, the house manager, almost as if she still had some business with him. i wonder if she was up there looking for him and he was ducking her. which is funny because someone like her who is angry and aggressive is what he chases, he has more patience with that apparently than i ever would.

petty

Concession Counter at Movie Theater

lately i’ve found myself telling this story to some of my current coworkers. this is one that has still got me riled after leaving three years ago. basically what i’ve told them is a shorthand version of this very petty story. they all ask the same basic question “did she try make this as if i did something to her” or “was she trying to imply that there was something sexual”.

the answer to those question is, I have no idea. the basic story is that she ran to mgmt because i bumped into her to basically illustrate the pettiness of this story. and the worst part of this story is that the house manager – the no. 2 honcho at the theater – decided to handle this and this situation escalated. to be fair i was already not in a good state when this happened and the house manager has a tendency to handle things indelicately. this story will illustrate this.

this story started when i had to cook more pizzas due to a picky customer who complained that the pizza given to him was burned. so when i came back from behind the stand to hand him his pizza i was looking for him and he had walked off. just as i was going further into the front suddenly this young lady – we’ll call her kelly – was in front of me with her elbow in my chest. she said nothing and i just simply kept it moving thinking we both knew what happened.

allow me to briefly introduce kelly, physically she had been something to look at as far as personality she was young and often showed it. she often used her high-pitched and occasionally squeaky voice to complain. she may have on at least two other occasions used that voice on me to complain about something i.e. i wasn’t doing any work. one time she used her voice to mouth off on another male coworker who asked me and another coworker if we’d like to trade with him in his words “i can’t work with her”.

it was some time later that i was about to head to bathroom and i walked past customer service and h.m. bellowed behind his perch there “jack, did you bump into kelly”. when i answered in the affirmative his next question was “then why didn’t you say excuse me?” when he decided to start in on my right in the theater lobby while seated i heard kelly state “you’re being very rude jack”. basically this is how well that went

jack: ok how about this? i will say excuse me to you when you say excuse me to me. *to kelly

kelly: no because you were being very rude *to yours truly

jack: WHAT DO YOU MEAN RUDE?!?!?! *back to kelly

h.m.: walk away kelly, walk away

as you saw there i went off on her immediately and as she walked to the back i just simply asked h.m.: “YOU’RE TAKING THIS UP? REALLY? YOU’RE TAKING THIS UP?”. All he said was that well he was giving me the opportunity to make it right as there was no disagreement as to what happened. bad news is that since he got involved in something so petty now it’s taking on a different tone and hence why it got heated real quick. while i tried to remember this is the general manager’s #2 i was talking to i just couldn’t contain how out of line this was.

now granted she had every right to do what she did, this was clearly uncalled for. in my mind who got hurt and what exactly did i do for her not to be able to handle getting bumped into by yours truly. i have no idea if she wanted to suggest it was harassment or if she just had the need to complain about something which is more likely. and also was h.m. jumping on this because she was has favorite employee or had a serious crush on her that she decided to play off of one more time.

4G08Mmum

superman triggered

regardless his involvement was a bad trigger and my voice raised to the point where he suggest i watch my tone. eventually after this he pulled me towards the back where i wasn’t backing down and i had no problem telling him “i don’t understand why she RAN to YOU!” and still he wants me to just say excuse me and i tell him what i told her “i’ll say excuse me to her when she says excuse me to me”. finally just to calm things down he quickly and loudly told me to put my hands down i’m being violent. “WHAT ARE YOU TALKING VIOLENT? WHAT DO YOU MEAN VIOLENT?” if i was thinking about doing something when he said that i wanted to just give him a weak slap across the face just to illustrate a dumb point.

at this point, the general manager who for whatever reason was in the background walked up and ushered us into the office, finally. while i won’t discuss much about what was said in the office. i will say the GM approached this neutrally without pointing a finger at anyone. he did wonder what my problem was with saying excuse me to kelly. well here’s the answer i’ll tell you if i was at my wits end with “the show” and why sometimes fingers get pointed at me for some odd reason then how did a simple bump become a huge issue for the top two managers to address. also h.m. i always knew as a d*ck towards me so i saw this as another incident and chose a very small one thanks to a very complaining young lady.

eventually i finally went to the bathroom after being ushered out of the office so that the h.m and g.m. can further discuss the issue. when i got back behind the stand i was called back into the office with kelly so that the h.m can oversee us say excuse me to each other. and without being specific kelly had to say something before being cut off by the h.m. the h.m had to repeat a basic lie he wasn’t able to prove during this whole “fight” of sorts claiming “she said excuse me”. which he only said after i repeatedly  made my statement that “i’ll say excuse me to her, when she says excuse me to me”.

before this point i had an interview with a bank which i was still waiting on a decision. regardless this was just one sign that it was time for me to go. after this strange incident i made it a point to stay as far away from kelly as possible. was mostly successful until she finally cut her ties with “the show” later that summer.

positivity

thumb-up-terminator pablo M R

on this blog i sometimes talk about positivity though it seems as if i never practiced enough of it. i’ll admit that it’s my tendency to dwell on some of the negative incidents that have happened in my life. unfortunately “the show” is no different as it took up a significant amount of my time.

so allow me to be somewhat positive about my time at “the show”. as much as i dwell on those incidents with rambunctious and very take charge young people who were very willing to let you know to your face that they don’t value you as a coworker. there are some positives and as often stated i’m often in touch with many of these individuals from “the show”.

some were cool and good to talk with even if on occasion what i may be saying isn’t what they want to hear. and yes some of them – like anthony – has the tendency to want to take advantage of the situation. i’ll still say that it was worthwhile knowing them and even then if it wasn’t for anthony i may never have started looking for another job even if it took over two years to finally leave the theater.

there were many good times there and often with the right people. i also miss the occasions where i drove to work with me sometimes taking alternate route too and from work. also i’m lucky that no one knew to do something to my mother’s vehicle especially if i raised the ire of some many at the job. on top of that many of them decided i wasn’t going to do much about it.

the ones i did well with i try to bring them with me although many have so far not took the plunge. some have found better positions and that’s definitely a good thing. many of them it would be cool to bring them with me to my current job and beyond.

if you’ve read this blog you got to know anthony a little bit. an outspoken older gentlemen who means well but seems to have the ability to talk down to people. on the other hand he’s a bit of a fighter who looks at the big picture. through him i knew about the ways “the show” used obamacare to cut hours. he was good at learning the lay of the land there in ways i never considered. when we first met he came on strong and caused some distance and still can come on strong.

there’s a man named henry who we’ll meet again in another post. he was very good at his job to the point where he often was an usher on weekends and was an unofficial trainer. good to talk about and also knew the lay of the land. on the flip side, he sure had some drama in his life if you judged my his fb page years ago. he left and found another job months before i had.

also there a man name keith who became a manager within months after i left. he gave me the definitive  low-down on what it’s like to move up to the supervisory level not long after he got fired. the worse thing about his termination was that the people he thought were friends were the ones who turned on him and helped get him out. he probably still hasn’t figured out why they did what they did. as happens with young coworkers in a place with no structure at all!

there’s an older lady name kristi whom i worked with the first two years. i haven’t stayed in touch with her much over the years although i gave her a quick update on what happened at the show since she left. which managers got fired and moved on. she was a cool ally to have and it’s too bad that she left the job due to illness.

those are just some examples. i texted keith once not long after he left “the show” that i’m very glad i never burned bridged with everyone. i began to believe i was that bad, then he concurred with my next statement “the people who worked with whom bridges were burned were just looking for excuses.” so i could dwell on the negative aspects, but what i will choose to do from this point forward is to remember those i worked well with!

also i forgot to add with the many managers and supervisors i interacted with – which does include someone like harve – i’ve offered thank you cards to two senior managers who were helpful during the “streak era”. unfortunately neither are no longer at the show, although with one i have his phone number and perhaps i should just dial him up in the near future.

frustration

frustration

next month i would like to talk more about why i left the job at “the show” two years ago. what i hoped to gain by leaving and indeed what led up to me leaving. in effect next month is marking another milestone, it’s been two years since i finally left.

a few months ago i talked about frustration. it led me to have very unfortunate relationships with some of my coworkers. it led to some conflict with many of the most drama prone individuals – mostly teenaged girls. however with that experience i was able to take it with me to the next point.

when i last met with anthony i thought about some moments that i got caught up in easily and it was out of frustration with my role there. i got into with people even when for the most part i tried hard to ignore any potential issues.

with that being said on my end there was some aloofness and it may have kept me from advancing there. it may have allowed some of the young people to take some of my actions personally. i feel as if many of them thought it was about them when it wasn’t.

in some cases i knew after some incidents that some were trouble so i kept my distance. and it becomes i question everything you do because you won’t speak to me. i could be as silly as they are.

sometimes it gives me the idea that those individuals willingness to make someone a target they had their own miseries that they either brought with them to work or they were miserable at work. the thing is at this point their problems are now their problems and it is their own problem to work through them.

then i consider what has happened the past year and a half. leaving was the best thing i did. who knows where the troublemakers are now. at least now they still arent part of my future.

A one-off foe…

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On tinder one day I ran into a familiar face – someone I used to work with at the movie theater – for whom I have no good feelings. My first instinct was to swipe left. I had no interest in expressing any willingness to have any contact.

I showed a pic of her to a friend of mine who quickly responded that she looked like a b*tch. My response was that I found out about that the hard way. I found out about her disposition at work.

She was about to be the subject of a post last year. One I chose to trash because it just made me angry all over again. And it was less important for me to really give her more attention in my life than she actually deserved. I’ve encountered her on occasion while still at the theater and thankfully she didn’t say anything to me as she used to.

To be honest I did want to write about some workplace drama involving her. Really had little to do with me to be honest although to be sure this is not something a soap opera writer could come up with. Part of this drama involves someone who I found out through sleuthing and observation that she’s a good friend of Candace.

Well thankfully I need not even think or consider this anymore. it’s too far in the past and that moment years ago was only temporary. no one really got what they wanted out of any of it.

In the meanwhile I see the old grouch – who seems to have an ability to connect with people and had been lauded as a people person – is herself on the prowl. Question is whether or not she’s seriously looking or looking for a man to prank on. It’s not for me to answer & I need not find out.

BTW, in those initial posts I gave her a name which is Missy. Missy is a renegade time lord on Doctor Who who is generally considered evil and had become a woman. Not some sex change but definitely a science fiction style gender change. This will explain the picture up top.

bitter

BitterOats_22oz

being bitter is not a good state and i only recently began to realize this. as stated once before dwelling is something i realize i tend to do. it’s very easy to sit around and just think about something you may or may not have had control over.

at times i know that many of those i consider friends or just coworkers realize i wasn’t always a joy to be around. that is one of my regrets as unfortunately it takes me to time to realize the effect i have on people.

all the same,  i recently paid a visit to the neighborhood of the cinema where i formerly worked. nothing really has changed other than the shopping center where my job had been located now has more shopping options. i decided to pay a visit to a target nearby but only to use the bathroom and browse for the first time in a while. actually i only realized i had to use it after getting on the train and then sensing my bladder fill up and then deciding it would be difficult to make it home with this need to use it.

so i got off the train and headed to the target to use the bathroom and then browse the electronics section. it was a form of nostalgia because it’s not often enough that i’m there anymore. but then i came to this realization…

this wasn’t my neighborhood or scene anymore. i don’t work there and it’s not likely i would even as much as attend a show there. although i do have people i know who still work there in a managerial capacity. one of those have over time attempted to have me come to a movie there and i always find an excuse to not go. all the same i began to realize how much i didn’t belong anymore.

the scene has changed in the year and six or so months that i left. probably worse problems after i left or none at all for all i know. i hear there are more problems but who knows what they are and i’m not there so it’s really no longer my axe to grind.

i can still tell the stories at least to those who know who either worked there and express my disdain for those who never knew that place. then again why? what is my purpose when i tell these stories for the umpteenth time?

i don’t know but when you come to the realization that it’s time to move on, that is the best thing to do. i’m finally there and hopefully move forward from there.