NSFW – Porn

Back to a semi-infrequent topic. To underscore the fact that this post isn’t safe for work the pic below is of Sinnamon Love getting some lovin’.

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I started this post in early February getting ready for this period called Lent. Those who are Catholics had chosen to give something up, often a vice but it could be other things. It’s something I have only become aware of fairly recently.

Hell I didn’t realize the big party in New Orleans they call Mardi Gras was in keeping with Lent. It’s not a very Christian thing to show off your boobs for beads. Anyway I digress. 😛

 I want to steer this thought towards how any potential growth for any relationship with a woman could be damanged or stunted because one chooses to view women through the lens of porn. I often fantasized about getting a woman in the same predicatement as that man had gotten Ms. Love.

Now to make Ms. Love not a nasty fantasy but a real person I can recognize that yes she’d be the one I’d like to make whoopie with. Meaning she’s done it in front of video cameras and done it many different ways so therefore she’d be worth it.

A lot of these women out there with whom I may have interest and unfortunately a difficulty expressing it I have no idea the extent of their desires. That is I don’t know what they’re willing to do for any man, especially one they may care for. It’s the great unknown and what often vexes me is the fact that it takes time to get a woman to the point where she’d even go there with you.

I realize often at various points that I have opportunity and it’s never taken. When it’s obvious I’m unsure how to proceed. Sometimes my hesitance may have done me some good but often depending upon her I may feel like I missed out on something.

Anyway, I realize that the fantasy of anal or just frolicking with a woman in general as they do in porn is one that intensifies in my mind. Especially I’m not getting any and that means somehow there needs to be some change in focus. Perhaps its in changing my comfort level with conversing with women and then steering whatever develops from that into attraction.

So far in just pondering this I still have little clue how to turn that imaginary key.

 

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No porn

no_xxxRecently I wrote about fasting from porn and I’ve decided to start that fast. This is probably going to last at least a week although I did find myself cheating.

Last night I logged on to the webcam site that is often the one I visit. Then realized it was time for my fast and quickly closed that browser out. It was past time to do something like this anyway and the time is now.

Not sure how long it took for me to finally decide this was the right thing to do. But now I’m doing it. That only means the two explicit pictures shown here on this blog are probably the only two I will see for at least a week.

Who knows though this fast may last longer. Still my hope is that this will allow me to seek far more from any women I’m interested in. Hopefully it was have little to do with being attracted to their bodies, but to whatever else they’d have to offer.