Virgins

The Formerly Unfortunate Virgin Male recently had an interview with Eve from her blog Unleashing the Cougar. A comment she made on this blog made an appearance as one of the questions for Tommy (the former unfortunate virgin male) to address to which he gives a pithy answer.

I recommend you read this month’s entry to his blog. It’s spring well he might have more of a spring than I am in Chicago, however, he’s still doing things for his enjoyment. That’s what life is about you have work and then you have play. And as happened with Tommy, things happened for him as he explored on his blog. If you haven’t checked him out lately plz do.

On the virgin front, I haven’t really found many blogs on virgin women. And while it seems far more acceptable for a woman to remain “untouched” if you will some may view it as a little strange especially if you go beyond a certain age. Just take this segment from Steve Harvey.

With this said, even though she hadn’t posted in a while Krysta is a virgin who has a blog. She admits somewhat to why this has happened in this post – I’m an adult virgin. She does in other posts talk about her relationship history and if she’s face with situations such as this, I understand why she remains if you will “untouched”. Perhaps Eve should find a way to be in touch with her.

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Odds & Ends

I have been sitting on this post for quite a while the events that happened in this post occurred during the month of February. So we’re just about in mid-March as I decide to edit this post some more. Unfortunately more to discuss as far as my former boss “Ruthless Roger” though we’ll start off with talking to someone I formerly worked with at “The Show”. Yeah something new came up and not much opportunity to complain about the past.

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* I ran into another coworker at “The Show” he was a cool outspoken guy who on occasion turned that mouth onto me. I could say he was a bit more reasonable than Anthony to be fair. We’ll call him Cliff and I was at the shopping center where the theater is located. Cliff just so happened to have been at a nearby coffee-shop having himself some donuts.

We got into some old drama, most of which didn’t involve yours truly, but one part of it helped get a friend of mine – Keith out of his job as a supervisor. Remember back in January I ran into another former colleague from “The Show” who used the word snake. Cliff noted something about another supervisor who helped get Keith fired. Irony is that Keith was dating an associate there while a supervisor, and this other supervisor allegedly was dating an associate although they were in two different parts of the theater. Remember there was a theater component and then a restaurant, during my time there they had been considered somewhat separate even though under the same company.

He let me know who does what at “The Show” these days. Harve became a senior mgr, however, he basically is over promotions and screenings – great pick up for him. Another supervisor we know became a booth mgr, the other booth mgr we knew who was a bit snakey has responsibility over other theaters in the region now. Though most of the people I had worked with are gone now. Especially those so-called “mean girls of s**tplace“. If many of them found better jobs then I will definitely say good for them.

* Oh another senior mgr who had gotten quickly promoted from associate to supervisor then senior mgr I learned had been sent to corporate. I feel as if I know why that happened, Anthony got involved in a drama involving his daughter whom he helped orchestrate getting a job at the theater we both complained about.

Allegedly this senior mgr was trying to get Anthony’s daughter away from the customer service desk – people did tend to huddle in that area and depending upon the mgr on duty there was some success in getting people to scatter. Since Anthony could be pretty stubborn as he can be with me, his daughter wouldn’t scatter so allegedly this senior mgr put her hands on his daughter causing a scuffle. Bear in mind Anthony knows martial arts and passed this on to his daughter.

Since Anthony has an idea about the internal process of most companies he found out who the HR rep was. Sent letters to the general manager, the HR rep, and whoever else he felt he needed to. He was still mad because this senior mgr still had a job with them as she does now. She is no longer a theater mgr anymore so perhaps this was an excuse, but I never asked Cliff nor told him about Anthony’s daughter.

* Frankly I liked working with Cliff, he was good to talk to. He was on this day, he suggested that I go into “The Show” and speak to another supervisor that I know who was on duty on this day. Though I never really expressed interest when I left him behind at his table and and went to the front door I saw the house manager open the doors to customers. Upon seeing him I went the opposite direction so I texted this supervisor later letting her know what’s up. There will be another time to pick my spot for a physical visit to the theater itself, probably still won’t catch a flick there. Though if I did, it would be to see how much things cost up there today.

If you want to know since I’ve been out of work, I do go up there just to look around. In that complex there are stores where I browse around, but mainly to reminisce. As of late it has been more frequent than I had been while working. For a while it was a matter of this where I’ve been and now I’m in a better place though for the moment my place isn’t very good in light of my current circumstances. To which in answering Cliff as far as where I work now I just said “Fresh Foods” as if my firing never happened. Then told me of another colleague who became a supervisor at a nearby store who herself had made the transition from movie theater to grocery store which is also a “Fresh” location.

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* Funny thing is this same day I ran into one of my former supervisors who just so happened to have lunch with another former colleague at my former “Fresh Foods” store. They were seated at the coffee bar and I just so happened to be walking by they saw me through the windows just as Cliff did near “The Show”.

The former colleague we’ll just refer to as Jill was the one whom I msg’d on FB when the proverbial guillotine fell – i.e. the day I was let go. I predicted to her that “Ruthless Roger” may not be there in six months. While I felt it was erroneous to put a timeline on Roger, something told me he wasn’t going to last. Though I will say the justification for the six mos period was that I could reapply by that time.

It was through Jill’s status msg on FB that I learned that Larry was coming back to run my old dept at “Fresh Foods”. She didn’t just give a casual yes when I asked if Roger was gone it was an emphatic exclamatory Yes! She was the first one to report to yours truly that Roger has been demoted, gave his notice, and then quit within a matter of days. Unfortunately I’ve heard other versions of what happened with Roger which my former supervisor would state during my impromptu visit.

* Upon entering the store for the first time since the “axing”, my first comment was in reference to Larry coming back – “So we’re getting a real manager now!” . The supervisor asked me if I knew Larry was coming back, my response – “Exactly why I’ve reapplied”. I did tell them I have applied to come back though my 6 mos period won’t be over until April, however, if only they could justify bringing me back now. I’m ready to get back to work today (remember this was back in February)!

I tried to be somewhat careful about my comments with the supervisor, however, he did let out amazingly that now without Roger in the dept things have eased up a bit for them. Ahhhh so Roger was the reason for the same old b.s. that another colleague referred to back in December.  An old adage is proven true, it all begins at the top doesn’t it?

Anyway, while I decided to direct the comments towards the roughness, the supervisor even admitted it was a little bit of bad associates and Roger’s mgmt style. While he complimented Roger’s knowledge of the rules and regulations of the company he just had no idea on how to run a kitchen. Even threw out this idea of he’d have been better off being a manager at a slower store. I can see that, he was an assistant mgr at a much larger dept in a larger store and it begs the question what was he doing while he was there. My parting comment on this is that having that experience at this other store didn’t translate into moving successfully into a higher role at my former store.

* Jill didn’t say a whole lot about Roger other than how she knew it wouldn’t last. Isn’t that funny I could see it, she could see it, a lot more of us in the dept was beginning to see it. Perhaps it was him being by the book or some of his goofy rules or goofy changes. For goodness sake he even decided to change the format of the schedule from what we were used to. If that wasn’t a sign of where he priorities were I don’t know what is. It was almost like he was trying to reinvent the wheel now that he was our boss.

So the verdict Jill who in my msg last year referred to Roger as a puppet after I referred to him as  goofball she knew how the dept was turning out. She was grasping straws while I was still there when she referred to how we’re not getting our profitsharing or the dept isn’t making any money perhaps even more interesting Roger doesn’t even know how to cook. She was complaining a lot more than she should’ve, but she realized that he likely didn’t know what he was doing and his installation as our boss was for show.

While Jill and the former supervisor were further discussing Roger’s old store and how huge it was this was where I figured out that yours truly became the third wheel in their convo and cut my unplanned visit short. Told them in a fit of confidence that I will talk to them later. The supervisor even suggests I get in touch with Larry and get the process started on my return. Even gave me the exact date when Larry will take over the dept.

* Incidentally, my former store is not far away from the theater where I frequently watch movies. In fact if I get an early shift that ends at about 2 PM or 3 PM you will find me at the show on any given Friday, Saturday or Sunday to catch the latest releases. It also helps when I don’t yet want to go home, especially since my mother is now retired. Even though I have no job at the moment I still take the time out to watch a movie.

Whenever I approached the theater I made great pains for a while to not go anywhere near there. For the most part my path kept me across the street from the front and side windows lest I be seen by a colleague or even Roger himself. As a matter of fact, not longer after my last day at the store I saw Roger outside on his phone probably on his break and about to go back inside. I was a good distance away from him when I did and wondered what would happen if I got close to him. I’m glad that there is no answer for you here in this post.

Would I have gotten mad if he spoke? Would he just pretend he didn’t know me? Would I have remained civil? For me I’m OK with the fact that I just maintained my distance and just went into the theater nearby to a watch a movie on that day. Besides I would like to come back to “Fresh” why would I jeopardize that?

Like I’ve said since the “Breaking news” post my goal right now is to return to “Fresh Foods”. So hopefully the next time you see anything about my former employer is that I’m back. It will be then that I will discuss Roger further and at that point hopefully I will be summoned to return!

Isolation

I think this describes my situation:

It’s especially difficult to find a partner if you don’t like to go out much.

Redditor ShakerJew explained that they think they’ll stay a virgin for a while:

“I have no clue how to advance relationships beyond friendship … I’ve never even held anyone’s hand… I’m not ugly at all either. When I see people in a relationship I just think ‘Wow that must be nice but that is not for me, I can’t have that. I must deprive myself of happiness.’

User another-redditor3 echoed this sentiment:

“Not much of a story really.

I’m 30, unemployed, live at home with my parents and have nothing that even resembles a social life. I talk to friends online once every few weeks or so, but it’s been 18+ months since I’ve seen any of them in person.

As for interests/activities, the few things I’m interested in are solo activities, or male dominated.”

If you’re not interested in checking out new places to meet potential dates, that’s cool. Focus on your own fulfilling hobbies.

Now I got to think, what kinds of hobbies can I get into where I can meet people. Perhaps I can join a college alumni group who will on occasion support the sister “Hillman College”. Perhaps I can take some art classes or something like that. There is something I can get into that will enable me to find this fabled companion or at least meet new friends.

Are nice guys really that bad?

I think of myself as a long way from being a nice guy. With that being said those who are, probably have been subjected to women who are for whatever reason difficult to please. Perhaps the list I found was legitimate in some respects others are just plain nitpicky.

It’s a case of what do these woman want to be satisfied. They may never figure it out and probably will have to go through some serious changes to determine that. In my case there were a handful of situations where I simply lost my patience with particular women.

more original photos. what do you think?

Olloclip-iPhone-7-21 i’ve been going around using my iPhone to take some shots around chicago. i want to punch this blog up with shots that i’ve taken. i wish i can share with you some archival photos at least those that i have never before published. time will tell on that.

although to be sure i can share more current photographs of the city as i see it. perhaps you may see hints of where i formerly work or even where i do work now. to be sure i may never identify any of those places as such but you may see them.

oh not just places i have worked certainly places i have frequented over time. i hope you enjoy the new presentation.

besides once a commenter suggested seeing a photo montage from the “mid-thirties virgin” although now it’s the “almost 40 virgin” at this point.

unexpected

last week we had an unexpected visitor, my aunt who is a former military officer visited our house. no call no indication just showed up at our doorstep to surprise my ailing mother. she had a new husband in tow with her.

i was less than thrilled. all i know was when i heard some other voices upstairs it was at WTF. when my mother had a moment she let me know who was in and told me that she doesn’t like these unannounced visits. another aunt has that unfortunate tendency, she just likes to show up whether one likes it or not. although at least to be fair she was also up in chicago this weekend and at least we knew she was in town and to expect her to come over.

as it turns out her new husband is a brother to my aunt laura’s husband. and he’s also talkative with me expressing little interest in interacting he did try to reach out to me.

laura’s husband is a talkative man with a southern drawl. i can say the same for – let’s give her a name – claudine’s new beau. he doesn’t have a southern drawl although he does have a girth like laura’s husband. for some reason laura’s husband has rubbed me the wrong way in a similar way that laura has and it could be said i rub laura the wrong way with some of my behavior.

anyway it was an interesting couple of days. claudine has little problem approaching me and trying to converse with me even if my answers have been very curt towards her. even better most of the time she was there i kept to my zones away from the socializing. she didn’t appear to object although in the past she might make some things clear. for example once i was in my room and she made special emphasis that everyone else was in the living room. in other words i need to be in the living room….

of course her military behavior had rubbed my mother the wrong way – they are close. the newly wed couple had it in their mind to bring my mother to georgia with them when they left saturday morning, my mother wouldn’t agree to it. my mother moved too slow for them so claudine kept dropping hints to get ready and it doesn;t help that my mother still has lingering issues involving that compound fracture.

but those interesting last two days were over rather quickly on saturday morning. they hit the road while i was off to work that morning.

btw, as another aside this is what my aunt tends to do. she assess the situation she’s what i’m doing for example watching tv, “what are you watching?”. i was about to say some cop show, she quickly says “CHiPs”. yup that’s what it is. she’s always been that way i give a quick half-answer and then she quickly fills in the blanks.

perhaps an example that she’s into making small talk. depending upon the person i don’t share that interest.