may 2007

so i go way back for this one 10 years ago. so the actions set in motion from this period would likely set the tone for the next 7 years at least. i will begin to explain.

i was at “mission college” still plodding and largely floundering. i was actually a senior and it turns out i won’t be graduating that spring. i had my ass handed to me in several of my courses during the course of that year. mostly Fs with a splash of D’s and D+’s. and by the end of this summer i would be kicked out of school again and had to fight my way back.

yeah remember that brief blurb i wrote about a girl named nicole (yeah the post involving my cousin) well during that period i had also been kicked out of mission and appealed for re-instatement. i chase after some woman and got nothing for my troubles and almost lost my opportunity to get a degree from this prestigious college.

all the same i made quite a few key mistakes and paid for it with bad grades. i was lucky to come back out alive the next semester when i fought my way back in with an appeal armed with a spreadsheet determining which grades should count. if only i was that much of a genius so that this didn’t happen in the first place.

now why this sets the time tone for the next seven years – from 2007 to 2014 – because this would be the one time i just said fuck it. i was finally alright with letting this go. no more designs on getting a prestigious degree from “mission college” and i could jump start my life during what was left of my 20s. just come home and start job hunting and get my life in order.

while this life wasn’t exciting it was unconventional. this also would mean no more looking at those “hillman college” women as a college student. no more student loan debt, studying, expensive books or even courses made difficult.

i can only imagine what i would’ve done if i never got reinstated. i know i’d be looking for another job and i’d have to explain what happened with my school. why i never finished my degree and better yet where have i been since i really hadn’t held down employment. i’d have been a very risky hire surely.

then i wonder if i’d have found myself at “the show” and perhaps i’d be in a better situation in my early 30s if i had never finished at “mission”. to be honest i have little idea today. if graduating from “mission” was my goal i reached it to my surprise…

Life without porn

Sat on this video for a while, time to give it some sunlight. Posted about my experiences with porn here. Perhaps this skit you see summarizes my success with women. In this case perhaps one reason I’ve never had sex, if someone likes me I either fail to pick up on the cues or I miss out by not making a move.

 

the scene

movie-camera

the scene i want to show starts with me going to my interview heading into offices that appear to be closed as it’s after hours. until i find someone to ask about my interview. then we quickly flashback literally to the day before.

the day before i had gotten fired from the bank. no dialogue other than one of the branch managers saying “Jack, can I have one word with you?”

then all the principals of this scene go into an office where the door closes and then we go back forward to the next day. it’s after hours and i’m about to have an interview. a little nervous because i feared that i may have lost the job before i got it. ah well.

questions for the interview of course there are questions about experience. also questions about my hobbies and what are my passions. questions about my view of what the company is about and what they offer. in addition we talk movie theaters as that’s where most of my background is. just some points to write-in dialogue. what you should get from this is that the interview was a success as it turns out.

only thing is….it’s ambiguous as well we won’t see the hiring. we just see the smiles, the handshake, and then perhaps a security guard saying you got the job – a gut feeling. and then based on the notion of they want me to interview with other people.

in the meanwhile we flashback to the bank branch. i was walking from the facility for the last time. you see the virgin walking away from the inside not looking back.

a bad ending and a new beginning. sometimes i really enjoy thinking about that instead of the negative things. it’s something i hope to share in a video form one day.